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January 25th, 2009 by Sean Lottery Failure, Meaning of Life

It’s been nearly 2 years, and I haven’t won the jackpot. Therefore, I have failed my goal. I told myself, in March of 2007, that if I didn’t win by March of 2009, then I must deal with the failure directly.

On the plus side, I have won some money, and have beaten the odds. I can achieve some success… but not at the level I need to in order to win the jackpot.

I’ve been thinking a lot about it recently. For me, it’s been a question of Meaning. What is The Meaning of life, ya know?

A lot of people don’t really think about it… they pawn off the responsibility to some other person or book. That’s bullshit. Or, they conclude that they’ll never know, so stop thinking about it, and just move on. I also disagree with this approach.

If I knew the Meaning, then I could work towards that Meaning. For example, if the Meaning was to have babies… then I could just get married, have kids, and call it a day. Or if the Meaning was to help people, then I could just join the Peace Corps, teach people stuff, and call it a day. Or if the Meaning was to fight for freedom, then I could just become a Constitutional lawyer, run for public office, and call it a day :-).

The point is: how I answer the question of “Meaning” has a large impact on the decisions I make on a daily basis. It determines what direction I work towards. I’m willing! Give me a Meaning, and I will work hard for it! I’ve searched and searched, and all answers have failed.

“You choose your own Meaning of life!” Blah blah blah. If I choose the meaning of life, then it isn’t the meaning of life, is it? It’s the meaning of Sean’s choice.

See, I’ve developed another thought. Not only is there no meaning, but I think the entire premise is false. It’s false to need meaning. Instead of figuring out what the (non-existant) Meaning is, I should instead remove my need for a meaning.

What is meaning, anyways? What does meaning mean?

I get asked questions like, “I just had a really weird experience. What does it mean?” I never know how to answer those questions. What does it mean? What does it mean to you? I can’t tell YOU what it means to YOU. You tell me!

Ultimately, I think “meaning” is a bastardisation of “truth”. When we ask for the meaning behind something, we are really asking for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. What does a car wreck mean? Well, it means you were going 40 miles per hour, and ignored the red light. Then, another driver who assumed you would stop at a red light, drove under their green light… upon which, you hit them, because the trajectory and timing of the vehicles put them in the same location, at the same point in time… which can’t happen… so instead, the cars rammed into each other. The metal bent, in accordance to how metal bends, based on the atomic properties of the chemical bonds in the material. Yadda yadda yadda.

There is no meaning outside of truth. There is no meaning of life, because the premise - that life exists - is incorrect to begin with. Sure, since we are human, we have human nature… which tells us to survive and reproduce. But the truth is, that if all humans were wiped off the face of this Earth… no one would care. There would be no one to care. Just like no one cared when the dinosaurs went extinct. The dinosaurs probably cared while it was happening… but they don’t care now. The atoms that made up the dinosaurs are layered under the Earth, or are flowing in a river, or maybe inside of your body. The very atoms that made up a ticeratops’ lungs are now protein strands in your brain, storing your memory as an 11 year old. And those protein strands couldn’t care less that they aren’t part of a tricertops anymore.

When we ask for the Meaning of life… the question is false, because the premise is that we are external to this world, looking into it through the lense of this human body. When we ask for the Meaning of life, we presuppose a false identity. The real question - the only question - is: Who Am I? What is the one true identity?

So what the hell does this have to do with the lottery?

The lottery was chosen as a vehicle through which to test life metaphors against the backdrop of reality - without relying on a human mind to give it meaning. The lottery project’s question was: does meaning exist outside of the human mind? The results responded: No. Meaning is created in the mind afflicted with the disease of identity. Meaning is not part of reality itself… it is a by-product of the human experience.

(As a side note, the observed phenomenon of “deeper meaning” is therefore a result of psychology and telepathy - theory #2 is correct.)

So: what is the meaning of life? A good answer is: peace, love, freedom, etc. A better answer is: whatever you choose for your own life. The correct answer is: Mu.

…

…Still, we are stuck.

This entry was posted on Sunday, January 25th, 2009 at 5:55 pm and is filed under Lottery, Note to Self, Philosophy, Belief Systems. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

### 11 Responses to “Lottery Failure, Meaning of Life”

1. X-Master Says:
   January 25th, 2009 at 11:38 pm

   Who knows, maybe the meaning of life is to find the meaning of life. Which would then turn into a neverending spiral that keeps people going. Oh well, the only thing to do from here is to keep exploring, whether all we find in the end is ourselves.

2. aphorist Says:
   January 26th, 2009 at 1:39 pm

   I like where your recent posts have gone, Sean. I have a gut feeling that we’re trapped by this human-created idea that life has meaning. It’s prevalent throughout the world and it probably started to deal with strife and hard times. If there’s a larger scheme than you, then your struggles are for “something” rather than “nothing.” Maybe it started as a protective measure so people wouldn’t kill themselves off with their new-found existentialism (whenever we evolved such thinking capacities), but today I think it’s merely limiting our ideas, ways of thinking, and evolution.

   It’s interesting though, how did we develop these existential ideas, if they’re based on a completely false premise?

   I feel like there has to be something very liberating about grasping the “dust to dust” mentality, but in my current self-absorbed state (socially induced of course), I’m still trying to find meaning in the idea that “life has no meaning.” Of course, as you write, the answer is “Mu,” the question is false, but where does that leave us?…

   On some level, this is exactly the type of “enlightenment” stressed by eastern thought for a long while now. So again, where does this truth leave us in our modern world, a world created on false meaning?

3. MagicDick Says:
   January 26th, 2009 at 5:58 pm

   Thanks for stirring up my thoughts.

4. f3licks Says:
   January 26th, 2009 at 10:49 pm

   You haven’t lost yet, you just are currently losing.

   Humans are the ones who would shout “I” on the top of the world. We are all obsessed with cosmically irrelevant notions of individuality and the pursuit of our own Truth.
   The thing about Truth is that it isn’t always true.

5. jack Says:
   February 2nd, 2009 at 3:37 pm

   if there’s no meaning i guess we should all suicide, since it is hell to be alive.

6. Ness Says:
   February 4th, 2009 at 4:24 am

   You put way too much thought into everything. To win the lottery, practice precognition and working with your subconscious. Winning money doesn’t have to involve the meaning of life, your true identity and all that crap.

   It’s like when people associate religion with Psionics. There is no real connection, only the connections you decide to MAKE.

   Break those connections and simplify your training. You throw a lot of useless philosophy into this lottery thing. Save it for another time. Your lottery practice time should be just that.

7. aphorist Says:
   February 4th, 2009 at 4:34 am

   ness, I don’t think the point was to win the lottery… the point was to figure out stuff and the lottery was just the means to that end.

8. Ness Says:
   February 4th, 2009 at 6:15 am

   Pretty sure the goal was to win the lottery jackpot.

   I just meant that he throws so much extra thought into everything. Even in this post, he started off talking about the lottery and ended up talking about the meaning of life and how we’ll never really know.

   He wants to win the jackpot, there’s no reason for all this over-analyzing. It only adds to his doubt and confusion.

   Now, I’m not saying to not analyze things. It just that it should be done separately. It shouldn’t interfere with your lottery practice.

9. Falcon Says:
   February 17th, 2009 at 5:22 pm

   About the lottery, I was wondering, maybe you fail because a million other people wishing something different, (that THEY will win the lottery,) maybe it becomes some kind of mental fight.
   The one with the strongest will + best concentration wins

   ~F

10. Joseph Says:
    February 27th, 2009 at 11:29 pm

    Hey, just to help you out….I’ve written to you some time ago about OBE’s….what i see now is you look for the meaning of life, which is, actually, human nature: curiosity…definition of curiosity: a state in which you want to learn more about something. one of the many human mistakes is to be so curious…because of curiosity we practice things we should not practice, we do things we should not. lottery was a bad choice to prove your point. the balls aren’t alive, th chances are too big…you have a small chance of winning, but so does half of the world.

    don’t look for the meaning of life..look forward to be more of a complete person. most of us will never get to know the meaning of life, we will never learn why, but why spend so much time trying to find something forbidden to human eyes? my advice: learn from everything around you, ’cause everything teaches a lesson and every lesson is a step towards peace. everything you do has an impact on you. try to analyze these simple things that happen to you, take choices based on everything you learn. if you make a bad choice, there is still time to fix it, just don’t get stranded on the Lost Woods, if you know what i mean.

    you’re asking the wrong question. think.

11. kjbaran Says:
    April 2nd, 2009 at 8:57 pm

    Must everything have meaning? Whats the meaning of the little toe? Why do we have it? Should it consume my every thought and feeling wondering why I possess a little toe? Somethings are currently beyond our understanding but that doesn’t mean that the knowledge is unattainable. Teaching a child quantum physics can be frustrating but as he grows he will slowly begin to understand. Seek an answer and you will find it.

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