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A Little Weird

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## Archive for the ‘Belief Systems’ Category

August 20th, 2007 by Sean To “Deserve”

I’ve been struggling with this idea of “deserving to win the lottery” for a little while now, and I’ve finally found the solution. First, let me describe my original conflict.

With intention manifestation, some say it’s important to feel as though you deserve whatever it is you’re trying to manifest. My problem with this idea is that to feel as though you deserve something is really asking for trouble. It’s being rude to reality. It’s my belief that reality will determine what you deserve, using precise and exact judgment. If you feel as though you deserve something, and reality disagrees, then you’re setting yourself up for disappointment and suffering.

So my solution to that was to never feel as though I deserved anything. I hated seeing people do nothing and feel as though they deserve something. It’s rude. If you want something, then go after it. Work hard for it, and attain it. It seemed as though this feeling of “deserving” would get in the way. Whenever I think of it, I envision a bad employee who always complains about how they deserve a raise, or deserve longer breaks, or more benefits. Quit complaining, and go get it! Stop wallowing, stop feeling as though you deserve something you haven’t earned, and get off your ass and do something about it!

Anyways…

Those were my old thoughts. I still like most of them, but I’ve altered them slightly now that I’ve found a solution.

I now agree that it’s important to feel as though you deserve whatever you’re intending to manifest. And my negativity associated with “deserving” has been removed. Let me explain my new thoughts… (sorry if this turns out to be a little long-winded):

I live in Maryland, and went on vacation in Georgia, where my family lives. We went to see an Atlanta Braves baseball game, and I couldn’t help but notice all the attractive females walking around :-). One thing I really miss about Georgia is all the smoking hot females. Of all the places I’ve lived, Georgia definitely has the most beautiful women.

I was also admiring the skill of the baseball players. I was thinking about how hard they worked to achieve their goal of playing in the majors. How much training and hard work they must have gone through, just to perform gracefully and correctly.

With that in mind, I tried to imagine a world where every person lived up to their potential. Where every single person found their dream job, and worked hard to achieve their goals. Where every person exercised, ate healthy, and was beautiful. I tried to imagine what that world would be like. Would it be better than our world? What would it be like if every last person on the planet was successful to their highest potential?

My mind started to create this world, so I could see how it would function. First I envisioned a baseball pitcher becoming the best he could… throwing the fastest and most precise pitches. Then I thought how this perfect pitcher would strike everyone out… But then I remembered - the batter would also live up to his highest potential. Each player would be the perfect batter, and could hit any pitch exactly where they wanted. I saw that baseball would still exist in this perfect world, because competition would still be valid. Perfect players playing against perfect players still produces a great game.

Then I started to think about perfect females. Then I envisioned myself living up to my potential. Healthy, strong, smart, fun, compassionate, etc. Everything maxed out. While looking out over the crowd of fans, I envision every man and women in the stands as living up to their potential. I imagined all of us had achieved all our goals, and were living healthy and happy lives.

After playing this out in my head for a while, I realized that it would be a pretty kick ass place to live in. Everyone would be happy, and there would be very little problems in the world. We would all be rich. We would all support each other. It would be really great.

This was when I realized the real meaning of the word “deserve”. I realized that we all deserve to live in a world like that. I deserve to live up to my highest potential. But you, the reader, also deserve me to live up to my highest potential. And I deserve you to live up to yours. And you deserve it as well.

I realized that I actually deserve to win the lottery. But so does anyone else who also sets that as a goal. It’s not really about earning it… it’s more about realizing that the world could be like my day dream. It’s possible for all of us to live in a world where each person has lived up to their potential. We all need to work for it. You deserve to accomplish your goals because they are your goals! And I deserve to have a reader who has accomplished their goals! So don’t let me down :-P.

Maybe I’m not explaining it correctly. My old thought pattern was that you get what you deserve. Reality determines what you deserve. So don’t complain about what you’re looking at, because reality has served it to you. If you think you deserve something else, then work for it.

My new thought pattern is that it’s possible for us to live in a world where everyone has lived up to their potential. And we deserve to simply because it’s possible. We shouldn’t settle for any less. We can create a perfect world, so we must. Anything less wouldn’t be fair. From this root, I see that I deserve to win the lottery, simply because it’s my goal, and I deserve to accomplish my goals. It’s on my path towards living up to my potential. And you deserve a webmaster who has lived up to his potential! So I won’t let you down :-).

It’s an interesting idea for me, because I’m not used to thinking like this. I’m sure many of you out there have realized what I’ve written in your own unique ways. But I’m glad that I’ve finally realized it for myself :-). Step 1. Randomness doesn’t exist. Step 2. I deserve to live up to my potential. Step 3….?

(Also: After finishing this post, I just checked my most recent lottery ticket. I won $2. Odds 1 in 75. I haven’t won money from MegaMillions since I realized that randomness doesn’t exist :-P. I think I’m on the right track.)

Posted in Lottery, Belief Systems | 22 Comments »

August 1st, 2007 by Sean Why Religion is Wrong

Oh goodie :-). A provoking topic.

Everyone takes jabs at religion. It’s pretty easy to attack something people believe in, no matter what that belief is. I encourage people to believe in things - even if your belief is incorrect (which it most likely is :-P), then at least you stood up for something. That’s better than believing in nothing, and acting cynical.

However, I will now be hypocritical, and attack religion. There are a lot of things about each religion that I disagree with, but there is one specific thing that I adamantly disagree with that exists in most religions. It is the belief that their path is the only correct path.

To believe that your path is the only path that can lead to God or truth is ridiculous. In fact, it denies God. Each human is on their own path, and if you believe in God, then you believe that God put us on these paths. To claim a path is “wrong” is to deny God’s intentions.

A sharp person will read the above paragraph and see how much of a hypocrite I really am. If I’m preaching that no path is wrong, then how can I claim that religion is wrong? I can’t. I’ve just bitch-slapped myself. Ow.

If there was one rule I could etch into the universal unconscious mind - one rule that people should just fucking follow no matter what - it would be this: No Killing. Fuck love, fuck understanding, fuck compassion… let’s just focus on one thing. No Killing. Period. Could we do that? But I am a hypocrite. The act of “etching rules” is in fact killing, in disguise. Oh enigma! That’s two bitch-slaps.

“Wrong”? Who am I to say something is wrong anyways? At best, I can tell others what I personally think is right… but even that doesn’t mean that it is right. I’ve disagreed with myself more times than the community at large has. I’ve change my beliefs and opinions so many times… when can I start preaching? Where do I begin? The second I start is the second I change my mind, and have to disprove what I’ve just proven. Those that listen just inherit my struggles on top of their own. Eek!

However, if I try to convey this observation to those that have yet to observe it, then I’m a victim of my own palm. And if I do nothing, then my realizations are worthless.

Where is the illusion? I’ve found it.

Truth cannot be conveyed. Any attempts to teach truth to someone else is an immediate failure. This sentence fails. Truth can only be attained by the self. No one else can attain it for us.

Is religion wrong? Or does mind make it wrong? If I can change my mind on what my favorite movie is, then can’t I change my religion as well? Who is right? The me that is religious, or the me that is anti-religious?

Bahaha :-).

Posted in Note to Self, Philosophy, Belief Systems | 26 Comments »

June 21st, 2007 by Sean New Strategy

First off - thanks for everyone’s comments. You guys present views that I wouldn’t be able to see otherwise, and it helps.

Let me summarize my previous post, now that I’ve had time to digest everything.

Intention manifestation is slightly flawed. It’s a good model overall, but there is a problem. The problem is that we believe that a “sense of knowing” causes our intention to manifest. Because of that belief, we design our exercises in ways to induce this “sense of knowing” within us. This is incorrect (although it can produce some limited results).

I believe intention manifestation made this problem because it saw that successful people had a “sense of knowing” before they succeeded, so we assumed this “sense of knowing” causes the success. This is a logical fallacy, called Post Hoc. Just because it came before doesn’t mean that it caused it.

One way to explain this is that something happened before the “sense of knowing” came. This something caused the “sense of knowing”, and it also caused the success. Another way to explain it is that something happened before the success, and we have a precognitive facility that sees the success happening, which causes the “sense of knowing”. There could be a million explanations, these are just two alternatives. Here’s a picture:

It is my current understanding that both alternate 1 and alternate 2 could be true at the same time, and that “something” is choice.

Now, I can dance around in the theoretical mind junk mumbo jumbo all I want… what actual changes are made with this altered perspective?

With intention manifestation, our goal is to induce the “sense of knowing”. We can do that with visualization, altering our beliefs, feeling the success, etc. All our techniques stem from inducing a “sense of knowing”. With the alternate ideas, our goal changes… now we need to figure out what that “something” is, and how to do it.

But all hope is not lost. It seems we might have more work to do, but not really. We have a pretty good hint - when we do that “something” correctly, we should experience a “sense of knowing”. Not FORCING it. We should naturally experience it.

So my new technique for winning the lottery has changed. Instead of repeating mantras in my mind about how I’ve won, I’m going to instead alter my number picking strategy. I tried this strategy on the last drawing and had minimal success (nothing crazy or definite). My new strategy is to write down numbers, and see if I feel a “sense of knowing” about them. When I focus on them, do I feel that the numbers are winners? Do I feel confident? Am I sure they will win?

If I don’t feel that confidence, then I tweak the numbers, and try again. And again. And again. Until I feel I’ve optimized my “sense of knowing”. Then I play those numbers.

I will try this new strategy for a month or two, and see how it goes.

Posted in Lottery, Belief Systems | 27 Comments »

June 19th, 2007 by Sean My Current Understanding, v3.0

READ: This is a huge post. I’m sorry - I can’t help myself - my thoughts must move! I realize that most people probably won’t read it all - that’s fine, I don’t expect anyone to. This post is more for my own documentation than it is to share my ideas with everyone. In a future post, I will condense this down into a more readable format. Until then, I need to document my thoughts before the next lottery drawing…

So anyways… I lost the lottery on June 15th, and it really pissed me off, and got me thinking. Look - there’s an important lesson here that needs to be learned by the majority of people on this planet. When you’re wrong, you’re wrong. It’s not reality’s fault - it’s mine. When your model of reality is incorrect, you DO NOT force reality to fit into your arbitrary mold. You change your model, and learn from your mistakes. That’s what this post is about.

I was wrong about intention manifestation. I believe intention manifestation is a very nice model of reality, but there are some flaws, and these flaws are holding me back. All models of reality have partial truths in them, so I must take what is true out of the intention manifestation model of reality, and create a new model that can help me win the lottery.

I was breaking the news to a friend of mine, and he responded that first I rejected randomness, and now I’m rejecting intention manifestation… what next? Perhaps I enjoy rejecting models of reality a little too much :-). Either way, I have an updated understanding (which will someday be replaced by yet another, I’m sure). On to version 3.0…

The realization I made originated in my second lottery adventure, which is documented in text and video. What sparked that experience was that I went to the store, and tried to force a win from the scratch off machine. And I failed. Being pissed, I decided to listen instead of forcing things, and documented one of my biggest wins on video as a result.

Where intention manifestation fails is that it gives you the sense that you can accomplish anything, as long as you believe it through and through. This is false. I hate to be a downer, and I hate to sound negative… but I have to conclude it’s false based on the evidence. Belief can help by filtering and aligning your perspective on reality - but belief alone can not create. All it does is change the filter, which can help you in finding opportunities, and things of that nature. With an open belief system, your eyes are more open to success. Belief is important - but belief alone does not do the creation.

Intention manifestation agrees with this mostly. Intention manifestation states that you have to have belief, but you also have to have feelings - you have to visualize and feel as though your goal is true in this moment. Intention manifestation states it’s more than just positive thinking… it’s more than just filtering your perspective. Adding emotions into the mix, and really FEELING it, will produce results. This is false.

Now you might jump out of your seat and yell - “Wait a second, you’ve been using intention manifestation to do all sorts of things, and you’ve gotten results! How can you say that intention manifestation is false?! You’ve used it and seen it with your own eyes!”

True enough. I have used intention manifestation to produce results that can’t be explained by simply altering your beliefs, and changing your filter. On the surface, it seems as though intention manifestation is true, and that’s whats so tricky about it. But we have to dig a little deeper.

The truth is that sometimes intentions come true, and sometimes they don’t. The truth is that sometimes we go through all the steps, and it just doesn’t work. Sometimes it does! And it’s awesome! But sometimes it doesn’t. So obviously we’re missing something in the equation. Some other factor that plays an important role, or some other understanding.

Hopefully I haven’t lost you just yet. Let me review everything, from the beginning, to clear up what I’m about to do.

Ok. So we have these models for reality. Everyone has models for reality in their own minds… we might call them “belief systems”, or “the way things are”, or “how things work”, or “religion” … etc. We all have an internal model of reality that we use in our minds.

Now there are some popular models that a lot of people share. For example, the skeptical/cynical model of reality (version 1.0). If I were to tell a skeptic that I plan on winning the lottery, they might respond that it is POSSIBLE for me to win… but in all likelihood, I won’t. They might use concepts found in statistics and probability to talk about how the world works, and how the lottery is designed to make a profit for the government. They might say that the lottery is the tax for the stupid. Stuff like that. This is all in their model of reality. Now the skeptic usually has trouble telling the difference between actual reality, and the model of reality in their head. They think they see reality perfectly clear, and usually have a hard time admitting that they just might be wrong. They haven’t made the distinction that it’s simply a model in their own mind. But that’s ok, we can forgive them for now.

In the New Age and Personal Development circles, we have the intention manifestation model of reality (version 2.0). If I tell people who subscribe to this model that I plan on winning the lottery, most would probably cheer me on saying that it’s certainly possible if I do what intention manifestation tells me to do. Some people might argue that because I’m getting “something for nothing”, that I will fail, because I don’t have a noble cause. But most would probably admit that it’s possible. They would tell me that I have to really believe that I can win, and that I have to meditate and visualize myself winning, and feel all the emotions associated with that. Really put myself in the moment and feel like a winner. Feel like I just won. See it in my mind so clearly that it becomes superimposed on my subconscious mind, and transmitted out to the universe to attract it using “vibrations” and such. Ok.

Now, those are just two models of reality. Sure, they are each interesting in their own right, and they each have a body of literature and history. They each have truths that can’t be denied. But both of them are still just models of reality made by humans… they inherently have faults in them. The trick is to separate yourself from the model you hold in your mind. Don’t become attached to the model - become attached to reality. Reality is the judge. Not the model in your mind. Reality determines what is possible, and what isn’t possible. Not your human understanding. So we must constantly evolve our own internal models based on what we observe in reality. We might not be able to create a 100% perfect model, but that’s ok. We just need to be flexible enough to modify our model when the situation calls for it. We need to be willing to change.

So… my interest in the lottery was sparked by internalizing the realization that the skeptical/cynical model of reality (version 1.0, dealing with probability and statistics) isn’t entirely true. There is a vital flaw in this model. I outline the flaw in three posts on this website, Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3. If you don’t want to read all those, I will summarize the flaw briefly here.

The flaw with the skeptical/cynical model of reality is that it can’t explain how people win the lottery twice. It simply can’t. Now, if you think that it can explain it, then I encourage you to take classes in probability and statistics to truly understand what our modern views of reality tell us about someone winning the lottery twice. If you grasp probability and statistics correctly, then there is only one conclusion to make: people should never win the lottery twice. Yet, people do. So we must admit that the skeptical/cynical model is incorrect.

Now we reach another crossroad. Reality is not behaving as the intention manifestation model states that it should. Just like reality doesn’t behave like the skeptical/cynical model says it should. What is our response? Modify our model of reality. We are forced to reject intention manifestation, the same way we were forced to reject modern ideas of probability and statistics.

When we rejected probability and statistics, we didn’t reject everything. We can’t. A lot of probability and statistics is completely correct and accurate! I would say probably 99% of it :-). But there is a vital flaw. Probability and statistics rely on the existence of the concept of randomness. However, it is my understanding that randomness does not exist. Therefore, while probability and statistics are great tools, we have to realize what they are doing. They are not modeling random numbers. They are modeling choice. Making that simple correction does not undermine all the work that’s gone into the fields of probability and statistics. It simply tweaks it slightly to more accurately fit reality - and it works.

Now that we’re rejecting intention manifestation, we have to realize that a lot of intention manifestation is completely correct. But we need to tweak again. We need to observe reality, and realize where the holes are in our model. Then we need to patch the holes, and use this modified model of reality to accomplish our goals. If reality throws experiences at us that contradict our modified model (which will certainly happen at some point), then we will be forced to tweak again.

So - where does intention manifestation fail?

It fails when we try to manifest something, following the instructions correctly, and it doesn’t work. Our goal isn’t accomplished. We experienced the feelings, we did the visualization, we focused, felt good, believed… and then nothing. No results. Instead of beating ourselves up, let’s beat up intention manifestation :-).

Let’s try to understand how humans created intention manifestation to begin with. We were pretty smart about it… What we did was go around, and interview and talk to all these successful people. We asked them, “How did you do it? What is your story? What made you succeed where everyone else failed?” This is a great idea! Asking questions is a brilliant idea.

Successful people responded with their stories. And a lot of these stories had things in common. So, being the smart human race that we are, we looked at the patterns. We noticed that a lot of successful people had a burning desire to succeed. And this desire consumed their thoughts. We noticed that a lot of successful people believed they would succeed before they did - even when they logically shouldn’t have believed it. We noticed that this burning desire and belief were the very things that made them succeed. Story after story, we noticed that it was this burning desire and belief that got these people through the tough times, and allowed them to create opportunities for them, that led to success. Amazing!

So, after we noticed this, we proclaimed: Successful people had a burning desire and unwavering belief before they were successful. If you want to be successful, you need a burning desire and unwavering belief. Tada!

This idea is outlined in hundreds of books, the most popular of which is undoubtedly Napoleon Hill’s, Think and Grow Rich, published in 1937. A lot of books influenced the creation of the intention manifestation model of reality, but it is my opinion that this book is one of the major ones.

Over time, the intention manifestation model has evolved into what we see presented today, by programs like “The Secret“, and all the other ripoffs. It has evolved from this idea of burning desire and belief, into visualization and feeling your goal is already achieved.

So where is the mistake? Where is the flaw?

I will tell you. It’s very clear to me now that I have hindsight. The flaw is that we think belief, expectation, and feelings cause our goal to be accomplished. This is incorrect.

This is the mistake that we made. We saw that successful people have strong beliefs, and having this sense of “knowing” that they would succeed, before they actually succeeded. This sense of “knowing” is very important - and anyone who has applied intention manifestation knows specifically what it is. This sense of simply knowing that your goal WILL be accomplished. You just know. The mistake that we made is thinking that this sense of knowing caused the goal to be accomplished.

It’s actually a pretty normal mistake that we make all the time. The cynics have solved this problem already for us (hey, what can I say, I owe you a beer :-P). It’s a logical fallacy, called Post Hoc. We noticed that this sense of knowing came before the success, so we assumed this sense of knowing caused the success. Incorrect. Just because it came before does not mean that it caused it.

Our techniques for intention manifestation are based on the idea that we need to induce this sense of knowing. We need to alter our beliefs. We need to create a burning desire. We need to make ourselves believe. We need to convince ourselves that our goal is accomplished. Once we do that, we will have our sense of knowing. And once we have this sense of knowing, then success will follow.

But now we have to reconcile the fact that people can brainwash a sense of knowing in themselves, and the goal still isn’t accomplished. How do you reconcile that? All you intention manifestation people out there reading this… how do you explain how a person can believe 100%, feel it, visualize it, get into it… and then fail? You can’t. Not with the intention manifestation model. It’s time for a new model.

We run into some tension here, because some people might fear that if intention manifestation is incorrect, then we must downgrade to the skeptical/cynical model of reality. Hey, don’t beat yourself up too bad. We don’t have to move in that direction. We can create a new model that incorporates everything we’ve learned. And since our new model is going to be based on personal experience and open mindedness, we’ll be sure to include everything we possibly can, which will in turn help us to accomplish our goals even faster than before.

So now that we know the history of all this bullshit, what is our new model going to be? I propose version 3.0, the choice model :-). Please be aware that I didn’t come up with this all on my own. My current understanding is a result of reading, experimenting, discussing, and stealing ideas from other smart people (one good location for that is Steve’s forum on intention manifestation).

(This is a long post, I’m sorry. I want to get this down on paper before the next lottery drawing, even if that means no one will read the entire post :-P.)

My current understanding is that choice is the root to achieving a goal. This choice is made before the goal is actually manifested, ranging anywhere from a few microseconds, to decades. When this choice is made, we feel a sense of knowing that the goal will be accomplished. Perhaps this sense of knowing comes from a precognitive facility in our minds that actually sees the goal being accomplished - I’m not sure.

What I want to point out is that this choice has a supernatural quality about it that creates the reality we will someday experience. This isn’t simply a normal decision that we experience all the time… this choice is on a different level. English doesn’t have the vocabulary for it.

Ok, look. This isn’t your normal decision. I’m not sure if I can explain it to someone whose never made a decision like this before. To people who have used intention manifestation, you’ve already done it, and you can probably understand what I’m getting at. There comes a point when you say to yourself, “I AM going to do this. Period.” And that sentence alone isn’t what’s so powerful about it. It’s all the emotion… it’s every cell in your body saying “YES” to this. It is a true decision, a real choice. Not the wishy-washy crap that we do daily. It’s the type of choice that makes you slam your fist down on the table, stand up tall, and stare reality in it’s eye. It’s not anger, it’s not fear, it’s not happiness, it’s not joyfulness. It’s the raw emotion of “am”. “To be”. I AM going to do this.

That’s where the power is. It’s not about good or bad, or noble, or evil. It’s raw “YES”. It’s raw “GO”. This is the emotion that is the root to the burning desire. This is the emotion that is the root to belief. To the sense of knowing. This emotion - this choice - is the origin. Maybe you’ve never made a decision like this before, but you’ve probably seen someone make this decision. To look in their eye, and see their resolve. It’s almost like their decision convinces you. You don’t know how they’re going to accomplish their goal, but just by looking at them you know they are going to.

It’s not stubbornness, though it might look a little similar. It’s different. Stubbornness is forceful in nature… this type of decision that I’m describing really isn’t forceful. It’s self-evident. It’s true because it’s true. Stubbornness shuts down your mind… this type of decision opens your mind up. That’s one way to tell the difference.

When you make a decision like this, the world moves. Shit that’s in your way gets out of your way. Shit you need to experience starts to bee-line in your direction.

Now - there are different degrees, which is important to realize. It’s not all about emotion, even though that’s the picture I painted above. Emotion does help though. We can throw all the emotion out the window, and still be left with this choice. However, if you want to make the choice consciously, it would probably be in your best interest to use emotion to help you.

It’s about existence. It’s about being. It’s not inducing a sense of knowing… it’s behind that. Once you hit it, you feel a sense of knowing. Don’t identify it as the sense of knowing - that’s where intention manifestation made it’s mistake. It’s behind the sense of knowing. It’s the root.

Intention manifestation points us in the right direction, which is why it’s successful. But it fails because it’s not precise. It gets us in the right area, but it misses the exact location. We may stumble upon the exact location while using intention manifestation, but only because it’s in such close proximity. These are the times when we succeed. Other times, we are still in the same ballpark, but we fail because we didn’t precisely hit where we need to be.

I’m not sure if I’m explaining it correctly. Sometimes my mind gets carried away… let me try again :-P.

Ultimately, it is a choice. Wash away the extra bullshit, and you’re left with a choice. Now, in reality, we have a real hard time washing away the extra bullshit :-P. So we have to deal with the bullshit instead. That’s where things start getting hard to understand. Everyone has different stuff piled on their consciousness, so we all have different things to deal with when it comes to making this choice. It’s tough to get through and make the choice, because there’s so much crap. That’s why we have techniques, methods, exercises, models, ideas, discussions, growth, etc.

Look, if you believe that you can’t win the lottery, then that is extra bullshit piled on your consciousness that needs to be dealt with before you can win the lottery. But it’s not even that simple. If that’s all you had to deal with, then that would be easy! In reality, we have miles of shit to wade through. A simple belief that you can’t win is just an ounce.

Here, let me draw a picture:

Alrighty!

All hope is not lost… yet :-P.

My point is that we have a lot of stuff that goes on inside of our head that stops us from making these powerful choices all the time. The intention manifestation model does a pretty good job of cutting through a lot of that shit, but it’s not good enough. We can accomplish a lot of wonderful things with intention manifestation, but it falls short when it comes to winning the lottery. We might be able to use intention manifestation to win the lottery, but there is a better way.

I failed to win the lottery this past time because I focused on inducing a sense of knowing, assuming that it was the sense of knowing that created the success. This is false, hence I failed.

Now that I see that this supernatural choice is my goal, I know where to aim. And I’ll know when I get it, because I’ll feel a sense of knowing.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

What does it all mean?!

It means I’m changing my strategy for picking lottery numbers. In the past, I just picked random numbers while filling out the lottery sheet. This method may produce a win, but I want to be smarter about it. My new method is to write down lottery numbers on paper, and examine my “sense of knowing” about them. Then tweak the numbers over and over again, until I find my maximum “sense of knowing”. Then play those numbers.

This “sense of knowing” is something that needs to be polled. It needs to be examined and used. NOT FORCED. Not induced. It’s already in us, so let’s use it! I’m much more confident with this strategy than my strategy in the past, and it feels much more correct.

We shall see where it leads.

If you’ve made it this far, amazing. I really didn’t expect anyone to read this entire post. You must be bored :-). Like I said at the start, I intend on making a much more smaller version of this post in the future. I simply didn’t have the time, and I wanted to get my ideas out before the next lottery drawing. If you’ve skipped to the end, then you’re a lousy cheater! JERK! :-P. Anyways… this post took three days to write. And my thoughts are still bouncing around. They will eventually settle down. Thanks! See ya.

Posted in Lottery, Note to Self, Personal Development, Belief Systems | 33 Comments »

May 22nd, 2007 by Sean I Won

Hahaha!

So I went to the store today. For no real reason… mainly because I wanted to walk outside, and walking to the store gives me an excuse to enjoy the sunny weather.

By the time I made it to the store, I had to pee, so I went to the bathroom. I came out, and figured it’s time to go home. While walking out the store, a lottery machine caught my eye :-). I had $60 on me, all in $20 bills. I was going to purchase one ticket for the fun of it, until I noticed a sign saying that the machine doesn’t give any change. So it was either buy a bunch of tickets for $20, or walk.

After deliberation, I decided to put in a $20. I got 9 tickets, at different price ranges ($1, $1, $2, $2, $2, $3, $3, $3, $3). I walked home with them in my hands, partly thinking I’m a complete fool, and partly thinking this is going to be totally sweet.

About half way home, I decided to send out the intention. I made the decision to make a profit. I didn’t want to go for the jackpot, because it was too unbelievable for me at that point. But I could realistically intend on making a profit, and not feel guilty about lying to myself :-P. I also visualized myself making this post online, announcing that my intention came true.

When I got home, I laid out all the tickets, and told each one that it was a winner. I also told the tickets that the total of all the prizes would be more than $20. Then I started scratching, from cheapest to most expensive.

The first ticket I scratched, I won $3. So I was feeling really awesome :-).

The second ticket was a dud. And so were the next 4 tickets.

The 7th ticket I won $10. So my prizes totaled $13, with 2 tickets left.

My 8th ticket won $24. And my 9th was a dud.

So: I spent $20 on scratch off tickets, intended to make a profit, and post my success online.

I scratched the tickets, won $37, and am posting this online.

I hate being right sometimes >:-D.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExUO4Po-MGM

Posted in Video, Lottery, Subconscious, Belief Systems | 20 Comments »

May 9th, 2007 by Sean Perpetual Failure

I have a friend who is Wiccan. Her mother is Wiccan, and psychic abilities run in her family. Every once in a while, I’ll go over to her house, and we might play with this thing called “Psychic Circle” - basically, it’s a board like the Ouija board, but more stuff on it.

If you know me, then you know I’m don’t believe in these ritualistic silly games. Nonetheless, I do believe it could be used to “channel” the subconscious mind - which could realistically produce psychic answers. So it has potential, even though it seems a little strange at first. (Of course, I could be wrong! This is just how I reason it to myself.)

When you play “Psychic Circle”, you need four people. We all put our hands on the little plastic disk, ask “the spirits” something, and wait for the disk to hover over an answer.

When we do this, it’s clear that my friend (the one mentioned earlier) is the person moving the disk. So she is either moving it consciously, subconsciously, or maybe a mixture between the two.

Now - the problem is that the answers we get are completely silly and worthless. However, I want you to imagine this situation. Four of us sitting down, with the lights off and candles lit, incense, and asking “the spirits” random questions. My friend delivers the answers - but probably isn’t aware of her own hand movements. We get responses that don’t make sense. Now myself, and the other two participants, look at the answers and say things like, “Hmm, that doesn’t make sense.” Or, “What the hell?” Or, “Ooooooook.”

My friend, on the other hand, defends the cryptic responses and tries to make them work. Why?

You might think this entire story is stupid, but the essence of where the failure occurs is very important - and applies to anyone practicing psychic abilities.

My friend has a vested interest in the results of “Psychic Circle” to be correct. What does it mean to her if the cryptic responses are worthless? Look at her belief system.

She is Wiccan. Her mother is Wiccan. Her mother taught her a lot about psychic abilities at a young age, from the perspective of rituals, spirits, séances, channeling, threefold law, etc. This is her religion.

If the “Psychic Circle” fails, then look at what’s at stake. It could force her to question her mother, her beliefs she’s held her entire life, past psychic experiences, past rituals, etc. Socially, she would have to face myself and the other participants, and consider that she’s letting us down. Letting her mother down, perhaps? She has put so much energy into this belief system - and she has a lot of energy dedicated to “Psychic Circle” being correct.

Now - I’m not saying the Wiccan religion is responsible for this. What I’m saying is that my friends specific situation really puts a lot of pressure on her.

And now the kicker - think of what happens when we start a new “Psychic Circle” session. Subconsciously, she knows she’s the one moving the disk, and she knows she’s the one responsible for the answers. She knows she’s generated answers in the past which didn’t make a lot of sense. Now she has to “perform” in front of three of her friends, and hope for the best - or her entire belief system is at stake.

Is she in a good state of mind to be receiving psychic answers? Is she in a relaxed carefree mood? Maybe consciously - but subconsciously? Far from it. So - because of all these fears, she’s put into a bad state of mind, and she can’t receive accurate psychic information. Because she can’t receive accurate psychic information, she feels her belief system is under attack. Because she’s put so much energy into her belief system, she decides (probably subconsciously) that it’s better to distort and force the cryptic responses to mean something, rather than admit they’re probably bogus. Because of this, the other three participants (including myself) grow more cynical. Because we grow more cynical, the next time we do “Psychic Circle” we’ll put even more emphasis on correct answers. Because of the increased pressure, she is in a worse state of mind the next time - and she can’t accurately receive psychic information.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

As you can see, this produces a downward spiral of increasing pressure on her. Which is bad news.

You might argue that this situation is unique to my friend. In reality, this sort of perpetual failure can happen to anyone. All it needs is a belief system that produces poor results, that we have a vested interest in maintaining. And we know that those aren’t short on demand :-P.

If you think something like this is happening to yourself, it’s important to answer the following question: what do I fear? What is the worst case scenario? For my friend, she might fear that she’s letting her mother down. Or she might fear that her mother is wrong. Or she might fear that her friends will call her names :-P. It’s important to deal with this root fear.

For my friend, let’s assume that she fears that her mother is wrong about Wicca, and she fears that the religion itself is incorrect. What is the solution?

Well, one solution is to change religions. However, let’s not go to that extreme just yet :-P. There are better solutions.

A positive solution would be to study the Wiccan religion more. Get some books - and not those “Teen Wiccan” ones - actual legitimate books on the Wiccan religion. Learn more details about it, and refocus on understanding the different perspectives inside the religion itself. Educate yourself. Become an expert on the religion.

Why does this solve the problem? It removes the link between her mother and Wicca. Right now, when she thinks of Wicca, she thinks of her mother teaching it to her. If my friend later decides she doesn’t want to be Wiccan, then she feels she would be insulting her mother - i.e., rejecting Wicca is rejecting her mother. However - if she educates herself on Wicca - then she can separate the religion from her mother. She is free to reject the religion without insulting her mother. Wicca is Wicca. Her mother is her mother.

However, if she studies more, there is another path as well. Perhaps she really falls in love with the religion. Perhaps she reads somewhere about channeling spirits incorrectly, and learns new techniques to try. This will give her a confidence boost, and free herself from all the pressure. If she’s trying a new technique, and fails to get good results, then she can blame the technique (or her inexperience with the technique). Not the religion.

-

If you feel yourself slipping into perpetual failure, then ask yourself: what do I fear? Then address that fear in a positive way. Create an intelligent plan to remove the fear. Sure, it takes effort - no one said growing as a person is always easy - but it will relieve the pressure and feel good :-P. And when you finish this process, and look back in hindsight, you’ll notice that the worst case scenario you had imagined in your head never happened.

Posted in Personal Development, Belief Systems | 2 Comments »

May 2nd, 2007 by Sean The Breakdown of Logic

Logic is a wonderful tool. Some people are under the impression that we should use logic for everything. Perhaps that’s a nice ideal, but logic can’t work in every situation, and actually fails quite a lot.

A lot of times when people use logic, they are thinking theoretically, and in their own little mental universe. They have a hard time seeing the fact that they’re talking about a fantasy world that’s inside their head. Usually when someone is too logical, their real life is emotionally damaged to the point where they would prefer to live in this theoretical universe in their minds, where everything makes sense, than to step outside their minds and deal with the illogical nature of the real world.

Hey - I’m not perfect either - so don’t get me wrong. But there’s an important point to be made here.

Logic is a great tool, but we are all capable of misusing logic. It’s important to know where logic is weak, so we can use logic properly, and gain it’s benefit without falling into the mental traps.

Logic is a creative process. By that I mean: given a situation, our minds are capable of creating a logical explanation for it. Sometimes we forget that the logical understanding we have about something exists inside of our head. Sometimes it feels like that logical understanding just exists on it’s own, and is self-evident. This is where logic gets dangerous.

For example, let’s look at a simple phenomenon: time. We all have our watches and clocks, and we know that there are 24 hours in a day, and there are 365 days in a year, and an extra day is added for Leap Years. We know that there are different timezones on Earth, and that while it’s 9:12am for me, it’s 2:12pm in London. We know this breakdown of time comes from the rate at which the Earth spins, and we know that years come from how long it takes for the Earth to complete one orbit around the Sun.

We all know this.

Have you ever researched time? Where did this idea of 24 hours in a day come from? What was life like back when there were no clocks? I saw a program on the History Channel about how the first clocks were invented. Before then, I had never really thought to myself what it would be like to not have this knowledge about time. Think about it. Reality would be the same, but our mental world would be drastically different. No alarm clocks :-). No concept of “15 minutes ago”. No concept of “it’ll take about an hour”. No age! “I’m 24 years old”!

The point is that we take these things for granted. We take the fact that time was created by humans for granted. When we use time in our lives, it’s so natural and feels as if the fact of 24 hours in a day is etched into reality. It feels solid. It feels like a indisputable fact that would be true no matter where we go. But it’s not.

This is how logic fails us. The TRUTH is that we used logic to CREATE a system of time. But what does it FEEL like? It feels like time is an inherent truth about reality. We have deceived ourselves.

But we do this all the time with logic. Another example:

One of my friends loves logic, but he also lives a pretty crappy life. He’s very cynical, and always criticizes other people harshly. I wanted to get his emotions to feel something other than cynicism, so I tried to convince him to work on a video game with me. I’m a programmer, and could do all the programming side of things, but I wanted him to do the story and art. I wanted him to create something, and feel a sense of accomplishment, and a sense of ownership. This way, he might be able to sympathize next time he thinks about criticizing someone else’s creation.

This challenge really short-circuited his logical mind. I could easily convince him that working on the video game was the logical thing to do. It’s fun, he had nothing better to do, he loves video games, it’ll be cool, it’s not hard, he can still sit on his computer all day :-), etc. In fact, I had him convinced for a couple of days, because he couldn’t give me one logical reason why he shouldn’t do it.

Unfortunately, he eventually created a logical reason, and refused to work on the project after that. He decided that he was lazy. And being lazy, he obviously wouldn’t want to invest time and energy into a project. Of course that wasn’t the real reason - the real reason was he feared being criticized by someone else over his creation. But now that he had created a logical reason, and incorrectly assumed his logical creation was an inherent truth about reality, he had become convinced not to work on the project.

This is exactly how logic fails us. We create a logical framework for something, then assume this framework must be true because it’s logical. We forget that the logical framework exists inside of our heads, and could be incorrect. We make the same mistake - it FEELS like the logic comes from the reality around us. Just like it FEELS like time is an inherent truth about reality. But, upon further investigation, we must concede that our logical framework was a creation that only exists in our own mental universe.

Logic is a great tool, but we need to use it correctly. We need to be aware that just because something is logical doesn’t mean it’s true. And we must identify the correct source of logic. Reality isn’t logical. Reality is just reality. It’s our minds that try to make reality logical.

Posted in Belief Systems | 4 Comments »

May 1st, 2007 by Sean How Beliefs Become Ingrained

I like to think of beliefs as living organisms inside my head. They aren’t ME… they are external to ME… but I choose to buy into some of them, for one reason or another. My beliefs aren’t me is because I can change my beliefs drastically, yet I still exist, right here, same old me :-).

I also like to think of beliefs as fighting inside of my head. Beliefs that contradict each other battle it out in the desolate landscape of my brain :-P. Beliefs that agree with each other team up. When one belief-team beats another belief-team, it represents a shift in my personal beliefs - it means I no longer believe in the dead team, and I put more energy in believing the winning team.

Maybe the analogy is a little silly, but it’ll help to use it when understanding how beliefs become ingrained in our minds.

There is a “Natural Selection” process in our minds. The “strongest” will survive. And there is an evolution in beliefs as well. Over time, beliefs evolve towards stronger ideas. If they don’t evolve, they usually die off.

Now to the point: A lot of times, the things we believe in are only believed in because that belief has navigated our mental landscape effectively. Not because it’s true.

Let me give you an example to clear all this up. Let’s examine the belief, “Psychic abilities don’t exist.” This one I have a lot of experience with.

At some point, the idea of psychic abilities enters your head. It’s then divided into two beliefs - one, it exists, and two, it doesn’t exist. Each side starts building an army. Psychic abilities exist because… maybe… “My mom says they do, and my mom is smart.” Or, “The world is a magical place.” Or, “I’ve seen it with my own eyes.” Or, the classic, “They just do.”

Psychic abilities don’t exist because… maybe… “Science says they don’t.” Or, “It’s silly.” Or, “I’ve never seen it.” Or, “It wasn’t announced on the news.”

Now the two beliefs battle it out.

1. “My mom says psychic abilities exist… my mom wouldn’t lie, and she’s smart.”

2. “Yes, but, that doesn’t mean she can’t be wrong. She’s human, maybe she’s made some mistakes. Besides, science says psychic abilities don’t exist.”

1. “What does science know anyway? Who cares what science says. If my mom could be wrong, then you have to admit science could be wrong as well. If you think that psychic abilities don’t exist, then you are taking the magic out of the world.”

2. “Science has a better track record than your mom. How ‘magical’ the world is really doesn’t play a factor into what’s true or false. The world can still be a beautiful and amazing place without psychic abilities. It’s just silly to believe in them.”

1. “Why is it silly? That doesn’t make sense. Besides, you can argue about this stuff all you want, but you have to remember that time when my mom knew Sally was pregnant before Sally told anyone. If psychic abilities aren’t real, then how did mom do that?”

2. “There could be a million explanations. Listen, just because I can’t explain every little thing in the universe doesn’t mean that psychic abilities exist. Maybe your mom just guessed and got lucky - who knows. Or maybe Sally told your mom, but your mom didn’t tell you. Maybe you’re just remembering the whole situation backwards.”

Now we hit one interesting point. Both the 1 and 2 beliefs are debating about a memory. What if a belief could rewrite memories? Then that belief would be pretty strong. A belief that could rewrite memories is more powerful than a belief that couldn’t - so, it’s natural for beliefs to evolve towards editing your memory. Those that don’t edit your memory will die off. Those that do edit your memory can literally create evidence in it’s favor. Let’s suppose the #2 belief discovers how to edit memories :-).

2. “In fact, if you remember specifically what happened, your mom received a phone call right before she told you that Sally was pregnant. I bet either someone told her, or someone hinted it to her over the phone.”

1. “Hmmm. I do remember that. I don’t think the phone call was related though.”

2. “Yes, it was related. She told you right after she got off the phone. I’m surprised you didn’t think of this before!”

And now our #1 belief is about to die off… unless it also evolves. So our clever #1 belief decides to get some help from surrounding beliefs - specifically, the belief that “My mother is honest.”

1. “Wait a second. If you’re telling me that my mother purposely lied to me, then that simply isn’t true. My mother is an honorable person who would never deceive me. She doesn’t lie. If what you’re saying is true, then you also have to admit that my mother is a liar.”

2. “Well, your mother did lie. You have to face the facts.”

1. “Absolutely not. The only fact here is that my mother is honest, and that if I don’t believe in psychic abilities, then I’m calling my mother a liar. Since she isn’t a liar, then I must believe in psychic abilities. Simple as that.”

2. *Croak*

Alrighty! So our #1 belief lived to see another day (for all the wrong reasons!).

These mental tricks are performed all the time. A belief will grow stronger and stronger, using tricks like altering your memory, aligning itself to other beliefs, name calling, social conditioning, altering your perception, “selective hearing”, becoming emotional, using pride and the ego, etc. All these strategies are effective.

One way to stop these dirty tricks from occurring in your mind is to sit and listen to two beliefs battle it out. A lot of times these battles will take place subconsciously. Sit and listen. Make these battles conscious. For example, when our #2 belief tried to alter our memory, we could consciously see this happening, and intervene. Perhaps you keep a diary or journal. Look at the entry from that day, and force your beliefs to play by the rules. Whatever your journal entry is, then decide that it must be the way it happened. Tada - no more memory alteration. (Of course, this still encourages beliefs to alter your perception of experiences, which would in turn alter how you would record it in your journal.)

Another example - notice how the #1 belief makes the statement: “If I don’t believe in psychic abilities, then I’m calling my mother a liar.” Our beliefs do this ALL THE TIME (another example, “If you’re a republican, you’re not a democrat. I’m a democrat, and I’m smart. Therefore, if you’re a republican, you aren’t smart, and therefore stupid.” - sound familiar?) When I notice a belief trying to do something like that, I always interject: “Surely we can have it both ways. It doesn’t have to be one way or the other. You can not believe in psychic abilities, and your mother can still be honest. You can be a republican, and still be smart.”

Over time, the strongest beliefs in your mind are probably in that position because they have the dirtiest tricks. Not because they hold any truth. An even bigger problem is when you believe in something that’s true, yet you believe in it for all the wrong reasons. In those cases, the belief can attach a lot of negative baggage to something you have to admit is true. You’ll feel obligated to also believe in the negative baggage as well, and it will feel like you MUST believe in all the baggage, even though you don’t want to.

Watch for these dirty tricks. Your beliefs will only use them if you allow them to use them. Hold your beliefs accountable, and force each one to make an honest case for itself. And if you ever notice a belief become too ingrained, let that fact set off an alarm in your head. If a belief is really strong, chances are it got that way by doing something dirty. This is why the “Beginner’s Mind” is treasured in Zen — in the beginner’s mind, there are no overpowering beliefs that dominate the mental landscape.

Posted in Belief Systems | 5 Comments »

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