A Little Weird

reality bizarres the standard

June 21st, 2008 by Sean
Morality And The Lottery

I feel like such a sucker for thinking so much about the topic of winning the lottery, but I can’t help it - it embodies everything I care about, in a poetic sense. Perhaps I just use it as an excuse to think about hard topics? ;-P

I was laying in bed, throwing my orange ball up at the ceiling, debating with myself about the morality of winning the lottery. If I could find a way to win, would it be cheating? What overall goal am I aiming for, and is this goal moral? Am I just doing it because I want to escape the rat race of living paycheck to paycheck? Or is there an honest and healthy reason for my obsession?

I can’t lie to myself… I know that part of me desperately wants to transcend society’s dependence on money. By winning the jackpot, I will essentially free myself from years of burden and conformity required by society in order to pay for the necessities of life. But free myself to what end? What would I do with my time, once liberated?

There is a divine balance to reality. Any push away from truth creates a perfectly calculated, equal and opposite push towards truth.

If my theories are correct, then society has made a gamble against truth. Society has taken the stance of “random things happen, and sometimes it’s just coincidence”. The lottery embodies this assumption by society.

But if the assumption is false - if things happen for a reason, and there is an underlying meaning in everything - then I should be able to win the lottery. Not for the money - but for the point of demonstrating the falseness of society’s assumption. After all, who am I to say that I am right, and society is wrong? What evidence have I presented society with? As far as society is concerned, I’m just a peebrain with a blog :-).

So, my goal is to demonstrate to society that the assumption of “random things happen, and sometimes it’s just coincidence” is false. Now maybe I am wrong - maybe society’s assumption is correct. In which case, I won’t win the lottery, and my failed demonstration can be used as evidence that some things are random. Of course, that’s not the outcome I believe will come to pass :-), but reality will be the judge of that.

Now - I believe that this goal is moral. My goal is rooted in revealing truth - whether I’m correct or incorrect. However, does this answer the question of what to do with the money, once I win?

Yes, I believe it does. Now that I’ve defined my goal, and my goal is moral, I can more easily see what follows.

After demonstrating that society’s assumption is false, I must spend the money on discovering the truth. It’s the only moral way to balance out the situation. I can’t take advantage of society’s ignorance, then disappear with the money to lead a selfish life of abundance. Once I win, it will become my responsibility to spend the money on restoring balance.

So, let it be known:

If I win the jackpot, then I will use the money to research the topic of both how society allows itself to become deceived, and what the truth actually is. I will create an organization in order to accomplish this research. I am announcing this because, in the event that I win, I want to ensure that everyone keeps me honest. I am human, and I will definitely be tempted to just pack up my bags, and live a peaceful private life. However, since I know that using society’s ignorance for my own personal gain is immoral, I want to declare my intention publicly. I will do everything in my power to remain faithful to my word - but, if I start to flake out, then I hope those reading this proclamation will remind me of my obligation.

Oh boy :-P.

Posted in Lottery, Note to Self, Philosophy | 11 Comments »

June 13th, 2008 by Sean
The Lottery - 15 months

I continue to have a strong belief that I can win the lottery… but I have yet to hit the jackpot (obviously). It’s quite the enigma.

A lot of times I question, “Perhaps I’m asking something from myself that is legitimately impossible?” - in which case, I’m putting myself under stress for no good reason. But then I quickly remember my successes.

I have broken the mathematical odds… no matter which way you cut it. And so have others. But for the life of me, I can’t figure out what triggers it.

I have exhausted all the “normal” techniques that come to mind, with close to zero results: precognition, trancing, remote viewing, micro-psychokinesis, intention manifestation, “just do it”, asking my subconscious directly, asking dream characters, etc. This has led me to try more crazy techniques. As a result, I have found two techniques that consistently produce results (and also sound even more insane than the run-of-the-mill paranormal techniques):

The first technique is to ask my subconscious to list some “profound truths” - and in the middle of hearing these truths, ask for a number. I believe this works because my subconscious has to “tune” into the truths, and while “tuned in”, I can ask for truths concerning the lottery.

The second technique is to video tape myself “praying” for the winning numbers. Yes, this actually produces results for me.

And yes, I realize how bat-shit insane both techniques are (especially the second one, which has actually been more effective than the first). But… those are the two that have worked out of all my ideas thus far.

Perhaps I’ve taken this idea of winning the lottery too far? Naaa :-P. Not yet :-).

I’ve yet to reconcile the seemingly contradicting experiences I’ve had. Until I can come up with a unified theory, I must keep experimenting. Besides, it’s fun :-).

Posted in Lottery | 11 Comments »

June 2nd, 2008 by Sean
The End, Again :-)

Back in March, I posted about a preacher in Ohio claiming to be one of the end time prophets that the Book of Revelations talks about.

Well, our friendly prophet has informed us that a nuclear weapon will go off in the United States, some time between June 1st, and July 16th.

I guess my big question is: if a nuclear weapon actually does go off in the U.S., will you be convinced this guy is legit?

In his favor, he is giving a very specific time frame, and a very large event.

Against his favor, some of his past predictions haven’t come true exactly as he has stated (nor exactly as the Bible has stated). But there is a little bit of wiggle room if he really wanted to make the case.

Either way… this prediction is pretty substantial. And we don’t have to wait too long to see if it’s true or not! Place your bets.

Posted in Conspiracy, Belief Systems | 37 Comments »

May 22nd, 2008 by Sean
Partitioning Reality

Being human, we like to divide reality into different sections.

There is day time, and night time. There is the weekday, and the weekend. There are people with lighter skin, and darker skin. This mentality of cutting reality in half has a name - it’s called: duality.

Dualistic thoughts can be very useful. After all, if I want to drive from Maryland to Georgia, it’s good to know whether I’m on the correct road, or incorrect road. However, a lot of times we use dualistic thinking incorrectly, or trust in it too much.

The problem is this: There is one, and only one, reality. Thinking dualistically is in direct contradiction to that ultimate truth. Is it ever really a weekend? No. It’s just the continuous stream of time. If you go to mars, are there weekends there? No. Therefore, a “weekend” is not something that is a part of reality. It’s just a human thing we do - we divide reality arbitrarily, and label the divisions.

How does this affect us? Well, there’s a popular thought that is dualistic in nature, that I talk a lot about: “If you want to become good at psychic abilities, you must practice.”

Hiding behind this thought is a partitioned reality. Now, that doesn’t mean the thought is useless. Clearly there is some truth in there, because people who practice psychic abilities do become more proficient. But ultimately - the thought has some inherent falsehoods because it’s reliant on cutting reality in half.

There are a lot of cuts the thought makes, but the one I want to discuss is that it divides experiences into either natural or supernatural. Encoded inside of “practice psychic abilities to get better” is the thought that your current experiences are mostly “natural”, and if you want more “supernatural” ones, you need to practice.

This is the falsehood inside the thought. An experience is neither natural or supernatural. An experience is just an experience! Reality doesn’t go around, observing events, judging whether something was bizarre or not - humans do! Reality doesn’t give two shits, and just does what it does. This division between everyday life, and some awesome and profound paranormal experience, only exists in our mind.

Usually dualism isn’t too bad. In some cases it can be very dangerous, like racism, religion, or selfishness. Dualism serves the purpose of helping us understand things in human terms. But it’s vitally important to remember that when we are thinking dualistically, it’s only out of the necessity to break things down to our level, and NEVER a reflection of how reality actually functions. Reality isn’t dualistic. Reality is one.

Only use dualistic thinking in order to serve yourself. Never enforce your arbitrary divisions on reality itself. Reality doesn’t care about whether YOU think an experience is natural or supernatural. So get over it, and start seeing the beautiful in the ugly, the love in the fear, and the supernatural in the natural.

Posted in ESP, Philosophy | 13 Comments »

May 15th, 2008 by Sean
The Truth About Psionics

I have a secret to tell everyone about psionics… others have figured it out already, but it’s time I let everyone know officially…

All techniques are bullshit.

You don’t need articles, you don’t need guidance, you don’t need answers, and you don’t need belief systems. The only thing you need to do is look inwardly.

Now maybe that sounds like I’m the one bullshitting at this point :-). Maybe I am! ;-D

Emotion is the name of the game. Emotion is the currency of will power. The only door that needs to be opened is understanding what you feel and why. And the only way to do that is to look inside yourself.

The only benefit I can provide to you is simply putting into words what you already instinctively feel. And maybe (if I’m lucky) I can also give you clues as to why you feel the way you do. But ultimately - you don’t need me to do so. It’s all inside yourself right now, at this very moment.

If I had malicious intent, I could play your emotions, and convince you that you need me. This is what the vast majority of society does. We go around, deceiving others into thinking they need us, and allow ourselves to be deceived into thinking we need something external to ourselves. But ultimately, that’s not true. There is nothing external to ourselves that we need.

Now some nit-pickers might argue that we need food, or oxygen. No, we don’t. Our bodies need food and oxygen. Or maybe you’ll argue that we need love and attention. We certainly need love - but must we look externally for love? And we certainly don’t need attention - that’s your ego talking. Be careful with how you define those words too - they’re certainly vague enough to cause confusion :-P.

The reason that all psionic techniques are bullshit is because the only purpose the techniques serve is to manipulate your emotions, in order to generate will power. The techniques are 100% dependent on how well they can stir up emotions in your current belief system. Techniques don’t produce results. Emotions do.

Therefore, to become good at psionics, you must understand both what you are feeling, and why. The better you understand yourself, the better you can recruit your emotions to serve your goals. The only way to accomplish this is to dig inwardly.

Somewhere, under the layers of self-delusion and confusion, there exists a God-like being. Stop searching outside of yourself. Stop feeding your ego. Will you passionately dig for truth, or will you be yet another victim of mind? This is the greatest secret of psionics.

Posted in Philosophy, Subconscious, Belief Systems | 27 Comments »

May 11th, 2008 by Sean
Geiger Control Data Analysis

Last week I removed the Geiger Game from the site, in order to collect a weeks worth of “uninfluenced” data. Here is my analysis:

3 May 2008, 00:00 EDT to 10 May 2008, 00:00 EDT

Measurements: 67141
Maximum CPM: 34 on 05/08/08 05:43:33 EDT
Average CPM: 11.575
Median CPM: 11
Mode CPM: 11 (7985 occurrences)

CPM at least | Percent of the time
--- | ---
1 | 100%
2 | 99.9806%
3 | 99.9121%
4 | 99.6827%
5 | 98.9455%
6 | 97.2103%
7 | 94.2285%
8 | 89.1824%
9 | 81.7265%
10 | 72.0558%
11 | 60.8793%
12 | 48.9864%
13 | 37.5895%
14 | 27.3588%
15 | 18.966%
16 | 12.5824%
17 | 7.8908%
18 | 4.6782%
19 | 2.6809%
20 | 1.4625%
21 | 0.7983%
22 | 0.4006%
23 | 0.21%
24 | 0.0863%
25 | 0.0431%
26 | 0.0238%
27 | 0.0134%
28 | 0.0059%
29 | 0.0044%
30 | 0.0029%
31 | 0.0014%
32 | 0.0014%
33 | 0.0014%
34 | 0.0014%
35 | 0%

Probability and statistics are a bitch. It’s a fact of life :-P. I plan on writing a tutorial and how to interpret these numbers correctly, but until then, I just wanted to post the table above, and the raw data for others to analyze.

Graph:

Data: Geiger Counter Week-Long Data

Posted in Science | 5 Comments »

May 7th, 2008 by Sean
Cultivating the Mind

The most annoying problem that holds us back from perceiving truth is the uncultivated mind.

First and foremost, let me say this: I do not claim ownership of any special truth, nor do I claim that I have realized anything amazing or awesome. I am not talking about truth. I’m talking about our ability to perceive truth.

The term “cultivating” is chosen because that’s exactly what needs to be done. You cultivate land to prepare it to grow crops. Uncultivated land has overgrown weeds everywhere. In order to make it useful, you must remove the weeds, ripping them out by their roots, and tend to the land to ensure it has rich soil.

The exact same is true of the mind. Self-deception and ego are the weeds of an uncultivated mind. It takes a lot of effort in order to remove the roots of these illusions, but in the end, you are better prepared to perceive truth.

A lot people don’t see their mind as something that needs that sort of investment. A lot of times we are distracted from our internal world by the shiny external world. It’s a shame that our society doesn’t put more emphasis on developing healthy thought patterns, and investigating the ways our egos fool us. Instead, sometimes it seems as though society rewards inflated egos, and encourages self-deception.

Society isn’t reality though.

I would like to think that those reading this blog entry are here for the same reason I am: through pursuit of truth. My number one priority is not to be rich, nor create a family, nor be a rock star. Not that those things wouldn’t be great :-). But my number one priority is to perceive truth.

The ego of one person can destroy a nation. The ego of a handful of men and women can destroy the world. That’s pretty powerful stuff. I feel bad for the race that has auctioned it’s future off to the ego of man… oh wait :-P.

There are two struggles I constantly fight. One is against my own ego and self-delusion, which I passionately fight my hardest to overcome. The second is the egos and self-delusions of others, which I am slowly becoming more and more tired of fighting against.

I don’t have any divine truth to convey. I can’t give you any answers. The best I can do is point you in - what I feel is - the correct direction. Cultivate your mind. Value truth over existance.

Twenty-five years on this earth. So far so good :-).

Posted in Note to Self | 13 Comments »

April 19th, 2008 by Sean
Geiger Game

Hey everyone!

Per request of SheepKing, I decided to make game based on influencing my Geiger Counter!

Check it out, and let me know if you have any problems or suggestions.

Posted in Website | 15 Comments »

April 11th, 2008 by Sean
You Are Psychic… Right Now

Hidden behind the idea of “practice” and “success” is this idea of separation.

If we want to become a great baseball player, then we clearly need practice. Becoming a great baseball player takes some natural talent, but like other skills, it mostly takes dedication, training, and repetition.

A lot of times I will equate psychic abilities to other normal skills. I might say that, just like becoming a great baseball player, if you want to learn to be psychic, then you need to practice it as if it were any other skill. Don’t treat it special. Don’t think of it as something mystical. Treat it as if you were learning anything else.

I like this method of instruction for a lot of reasons. The main reason I like to equate psychic abilities to other normal skills is because it breaks down the association between psychic abilities and religious beliefs.

It would be silly of me to be religious about playing baseball. While some great baseball players are certainly religious, and some might even claim that their religion has helped them become so great - one thing is certain: You don’t learn to hit homeruns by closing your eyes and believing in some mystical force. You hit homeruns by practicing. Maybe religion plays a role in motivation, but the actual skill needs to be developed, and the only way to do that is to practice.

Likewise, when I talk about psychic abilities being like any other skill, my real goal is to break this mental association between psychic abilities and personal religious beliefs. I might instruct someone to treat psychic abilities like any other skill, but what I’m really instructing them to do is to drop their insistence of explaining something unknown using religious ideas.

There is a slight problem with this though. Psychic abilities aren’t like other normal skills.

Normal skills need to be learned. The skill is external to yourself, and through training and practice, you slowly learn to perform the task correctly. The information on how to perform the task is external to yourself. Someone else created the game “baseball”. You must learn what they created. The information is inherently external.

Psychic abilities are not external. Psychic abilities are inherently internal. This is where the analogy breaks down. At this point, psychic abilities are not like any other skill. They are not something created by someone else, that we must learn the rules to. They are inside ourselves, at this very moment. We are psychic creatures - right now.

We are not all baseball-playing creatures right now. Some of us learn to play baseball, others don’t. But we are ALL psychic creatures.

It’s important to think of psychic abilities like any other skill in order to break our addiction of explaining unknown things using religion. However: once that addiction is correctly broken, we must deal with the reality of the situation. Psychic abilities are not like other skills. Normal skills are external to ourselves - something that we must engage with the world around us to learn. Psychic abilities are inherently internal.

Put another way: a newborn child, whose destined to be the greatest baseball player of all time, must at some point learn the rules of baseball. But a newborn child, whose destined to be the greatest psychic of all time, doesn’t have to learn anything. In fact, they may already BE the greatest psychic at the moment they are born.

So the next time you find yourself looking externally for answers on “how to be an awesome psychic”, remember that you are psychic right now - it is something inside of you at this very moment. The real question is at what depth do you understand your own true nature.

Posted in ESP, Philosophy | 18 Comments »

April 5th, 2008 by Sean
Beliefs, Reality, and Questions Galore

Ernesto e-mailed me a question:

> “As of now, I have just finished reading your incomplete sequel to your first E-Book. It left me feeling empty as your new website does not talk about all of the “Psi” phenomenon discussed in your first. I wish you could publish a blog in which you finish expressing the ideas of your sequel. Do you still practice Telekinesis and Psi Balls? Do you have any new ideas about how they function with this new broader outlook?”

One reason why I don’t talk about some of my current beliefs is because they sound insane :-P. Part of me would rather quietly hold on to my bizarre beliefs, and work on them in private, than to express them for everyone to read and criticize. Keep in mind that a lot of my friends in real life and co-workers read this blog, and my name is attached to every post, so I feel an increased burden to tone things down :-P.

Another reason I don’t talk about my current understanding is because it’s not clear. I don’t see it clearly in my mind, so I have a hard time explaining it. I’ll start to write a sentence, but it won’t feel correct, so I’ll try again. And again. Ultimately, the problem is that I haven’t “figured it out” in my own head, so I won’t write about it.

But for this post - sure, I’ll give it a shot:

The biggest belief that I struggle with is that it is my understanding that reality is a dream of some sort. And I hate saying that because it’s very cliché, but I’ve yet to find any other explanation for what I’ve observed.

I’ve outlined this belief in past posts: Everything is Meaningful, and I am Probably Insane.

The basic idea is that the things we experience in reality have deeper meaning. Just like in dreams, where certain metaphors drive the experience, these same metaphors are also the driving forces for what we experience in reality.

The reason why I believe this is because I’ve been tracking it in my own life. I have these experiences which are too bizarre to be labeled “coincidence”. I see the metaphors, sometimes while the experience is happening, other times after the fact. I can predict what’s going to happen by looking at what the metaphor requires. A lot of the time I’m correct (though I will be honest, I am not 100% :-P).

Now of course, the same old arguments can be brought up, that I am biased because I’m looking for meaning, or that I’m a sucker, or whatever. Those arguments don’t really bother me, because I know I am very honest with myself, and that no one is more critical of my own thoughts than me. But, from an outsider’s perspective, they do seem like legitimate complaints. One reason I don’t like discussing my beliefs is because I’ll have to argue these worn out positions with people who don’t care as much as I do. I’ve put years of blood sweat and tears into my current beliefs, constantly challenging them from every perspective I can think of, testing reality, forcing myself to drop incorrect beliefs (at the expense of my ego and pride), etc. It’s very frustrating to argue with someone who is just trolling around because they have nothing better to do.

Now, the question that I’ve yet to answer, is how deep do these metaphors go? On the surface, it might seem like I’m just arguing in favor of basic psychology. I’ve observed these metaphors manifesting themselves in reality - not just in my own head - so at a minimum I’m talking about something more than psychology.

Right now I’m divided between three basic explanations:

#1. Reality itself is governed by these metaphors. Reality is a dream. Science is derived from this dream. Examples of this theory are cited in the above links: Everything is Meaningful, and I am Probably Insane.

#2. There is an underlying physical reality that is governed by science, but there is a mental reality governed by these metaphors that co-exists with this physical reality. This would mean that the metaphors are a result of the mind, but that we see manifestations of these metaphors in reality because of large scale unconscious telepathy. I talk about this idea here: Current Understanding of Intention Manifestation.

#3. Something I haven’t thought of.

If explanation #1 is correct, then reality is a free for all. There are no rules. Psionics, and all belief structures, are now easily explained. This sounds a little outlandish, so I tend to side with #2.

If explanation #2 is correct, then there is a very large question. How does this “mental reality” affect the physical reality? In this explanation, macro-psychokinesis is not explained.

Most likely, explanation #3 is correct. But since I’ve yet to think of it, I don’t know how it works :-).

Now, the next question might be: how can we determine which is correct? What would be a wonderful test that would clear a lot of this up?

Well, winning the lottery.

The lottery is void of mind. If this “mental reality” exists, then the lottery would not be a part of it. Therefore, intention manifestation wouldn’t work on the lottery (which is my experience). So, according to my experiences so far, #2 looks like it might be correct.

However, the problem with #2 is the question of macro-psychokinesis - i.e., how does the “mental reality” affect the physical reality? Is the physical reality deterministic? Where does free-will fit into this?

If #2 was completely correct, then you couldn’t use psychic abilities to win the lottery. Yet I have already succeeding in breaking the mathematical odds, and other psychics have won the lottery as well. See: Psychic Wins Lottery, I Won, I Won… Again.

So, #1 doesn’t feel correct, and my experiences back it up because I failed to win the lottery using intention manifestation.

But, #2 is also incorrect to some extent, because I have succeeded a little bit in winning the lottery, and others have done better than I have.

So, in conclusion…

In my last eBook, I talked about belief systems, and how we can succeed with psychic abilities using drastically different belief systems. The question that I had at the end of that eBook was basically: how can that be?

My answer to that question is that reality is some form of dream. I haven’t posted a lot on this subject because a lot of the revelations have been very personal as I inspect the metaphors driving my own life.

The next question is: to what extent do these metaphors affect reality? Either reality is a dream, and physical reality is derived from that dream (#1), OR there is a physical reality, and a mental reality, each governed by different rules (#2).

Judging from my experiences, and my intuition, I believe that #2 is probably more correct. However, then the question becomes: how is macro-psychokinesis possible? I.e., how does the mental reality affect the physical reality?

At that point, a good test is to attempt to win the lottery (something completely physical), using mental means (psychic abilities). This will get me lots of money, play into my own life metaphor, and help answer these glaring questions about how reality works.

Any questions?

Posted in Lottery, Philosophy, Belief Systems, Science | 12 Comments »

- ## Pages

  - Welcome!
  - Blog
  - Forums
  - Games
    - Emergence Game
    - Geiger Game
    - Lottery Game
  - Contact

- ## Experiments

  - Lottery Project, Part 1
  - Lottery Project, Part 2

- ## Categories

  - Belief Systems (28)
  - Books (7)
  - Consciousness (4)
  - Conspiracy (5)
  - Dream Phenomenon (24)
  - ESP (17)
  - How-To (11)
  - Lottery (32)
  - Note to Self (21)
  - Personal Development (17)
  - Philosophy (31)
  - Random Stuff (11)
  - Science (26)
  - Subconscious (14)
  - Uncategorized (1)
  - Video (16)
  - Website (13)

- ## Archives

  - November 2011
  - November 2010
  - June 2010
  - February 2010
  - December 2009
  - November 2009
  - October 2009
  - August 2009
  - July 2009
  - May 2009
  - April 2009
  - March 2009
  - February 2009
  - January 2009
  - November 2008
  - October 2008
  - September 2008
  - August 2008
  - July 2008
  - June 2008
  - May 2008
  - April 2008
  - March 2008
  - February 2008
  - January 2008
  - December 2007
  - November 2007
  - October 2007
  - September 2007
  - August 2007
  - July 2007
  - June 2007
  - May 2007
  - April 2007

- ## Links

  - A State of Mind
  - Dreaming to Infinity
  - Monroe Institute on YouTube
  - Shifted Perspectives
  - UC Berkeley on YouTube

- ## Meta

  - Login
  - Valid XHTML

All Content, Images, Video, Text, and Software is © Copyright 2007-2009 Sean Connelly and their respective authors. All Rights Reserved.
Best viewed with Firefox, with minimum resolution of 1024 x 768. Microsoft can suck my balls.
A Little Weird is proudly powered by WordPress - Entries (RSS) and Comments (RSS).