A Little Weird

reality bizarres the standard

June 19th, 2007 by Sean
My Current Understanding, v3.0

READ: This is a huge post. I’m sorry - I can’t help myself - my thoughts must move! I realize that most people probably won’t read it all - that’s fine, I don’t expect anyone to. This post is more for my own documentation than it is to share my ideas with everyone. In a future post, I will condense this down into a more readable format. Until then, I need to document my thoughts before the next lottery drawing…

So anyways… I lost the lottery on June 15th, and it really pissed me off, and got me thinking. Look - there’s an important lesson here that needs to be learned by the majority of people on this planet. When you’re wrong, you’re wrong. It’s not reality’s fault - it’s mine. When your model of reality is incorrect, you DO NOT force reality to fit into your arbitrary mold. You change your model, and learn from your mistakes. That’s what this post is about.

I was wrong about intention manifestation. I believe intention manifestation is a very nice model of reality, but there are some flaws, and these flaws are holding me back. All models of reality have partial truths in them, so I must take what is true out of the intention manifestation model of reality, and create a new model that can help me win the lottery.

I was breaking the news to a friend of mine, and he responded that first I rejected randomness, and now I’m rejecting intention manifestation… what next? Perhaps I enjoy rejecting models of reality a little too much :-). Either way, I have an updated understanding (which will someday be replaced by yet another, I’m sure). On to version 3.0…

The realization I made originated in my second lottery adventure, which is documented in text and video. What sparked that experience was that I went to the store, and tried to force a win from the scratch off machine. And I failed. Being pissed, I decided to listen instead of forcing things, and documented one of my biggest wins on video as a result.

Where intention manifestation fails is that it gives you the sense that you can accomplish anything, as long as you believe it through and through. This is false. I hate to be a downer, and I hate to sound negative… but I have to conclude it’s false based on the evidence. Belief can help by filtering and aligning your perspective on reality - but belief alone can not create. All it does is change the filter, which can help you in finding opportunities, and things of that nature. With an open belief system, your eyes are more open to success. Belief is important - but belief alone does not do the creation.

Intention manifestation agrees with this mostly. Intention manifestation states that you have to have belief, but you also have to have feelings - you have to visualize and feel as though your goal is true in this moment. Intention manifestation states it’s more than just positive thinking… it’s more than just filtering your perspective. Adding emotions into the mix, and really FEELING it, will produce results. This is false.

Now you might jump out of your seat and yell - “Wait a second, you’ve been using intention manifestation to do all sorts of things, and you’ve gotten results! How can you say that intention manifestation is false?! You’ve used it and seen it with your own eyes!”

True enough. I have used intention manifestation to produce results that can’t be explained by simply altering your beliefs, and changing your filter. On the surface, it seems as though intention manifestation is true, and that’s whats so tricky about it. But we have to dig a little deeper.

The truth is that sometimes intentions come true, and sometimes they don’t. The truth is that sometimes we go through all the steps, and it just doesn’t work. Sometimes it does! And it’s awesome! But sometimes it doesn’t. So obviously we’re missing something in the equation. Some other factor that plays an important role, or some other understanding.

Hopefully I haven’t lost you just yet. Let me review everything, from the beginning, to clear up what I’m about to do.

Ok. So we have these models for reality. Everyone has models for reality in their own minds… we might call them “belief systems”, or “the way things are”, or “how things work”, or “religion” … etc. We all have an internal model of reality that we use in our minds.

Now there are some popular models that a lot of people share. For example, the skeptical/cynical model of reality (version 1.0). If I were to tell a skeptic that I plan on winning the lottery, they might respond that it is POSSIBLE for me to win… but in all likelihood, I won’t. They might use concepts found in statistics and probability to talk about how the world works, and how the lottery is designed to make a profit for the government. They might say that the lottery is the tax for the stupid. Stuff like that. This is all in their model of reality. Now the skeptic usually has trouble telling the difference between actual reality, and the model of reality in their head. They think they see reality perfectly clear, and usually have a hard time admitting that they just might be wrong. They haven’t made the distinction that it’s simply a model in their own mind. But that’s ok, we can forgive them for now.

In the New Age and Personal Development circles, we have the intention manifestation model of reality (version 2.0). If I tell people who subscribe to this model that I plan on winning the lottery, most would probably cheer me on saying that it’s certainly possible if I do what intention manifestation tells me to do. Some people might argue that because I’m getting “something for nothing”, that I will fail, because I don’t have a noble cause. But most would probably admit that it’s possible. They would tell me that I have to really believe that I can win, and that I have to meditate and visualize myself winning, and feel all the emotions associated with that. Really put myself in the moment and feel like a winner. Feel like I just won. See it in my mind so clearly that it becomes superimposed on my subconscious mind, and transmitted out to the universe to attract it using “vibrations” and such. Ok.

Now, those are just two models of reality. Sure, they are each interesting in their own right, and they each have a body of literature and history. They each have truths that can’t be denied. But both of them are still just models of reality made by humans… they inherently have faults in them. The trick is to separate yourself from the model you hold in your mind. Don’t become attached to the model - become attached to reality. Reality is the judge. Not the model in your mind. Reality determines what is possible, and what isn’t possible. Not your human understanding. So we must constantly evolve our own internal models based on what we observe in reality. We might not be able to create a 100% perfect model, but that’s ok. We just need to be flexible enough to modify our model when the situation calls for it. We need to be willing to change.

So… my interest in the lottery was sparked by internalizing the realization that the skeptical/cynical model of reality (version 1.0, dealing with probability and statistics) isn’t entirely true. There is a vital flaw in this model. I outline the flaw in three posts on this website, Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3. If you don’t want to read all those, I will summarize the flaw briefly here.

The flaw with the skeptical/cynical model of reality is that it can’t explain how people win the lottery twice. It simply can’t. Now, if you think that it can explain it, then I encourage you to take classes in probability and statistics to truly understand what our modern views of reality tell us about someone winning the lottery twice. If you grasp probability and statistics correctly, then there is only one conclusion to make: people should never win the lottery twice. Yet, people do. So we must admit that the skeptical/cynical model is incorrect.

Now we reach another crossroad. Reality is not behaving as the intention manifestation model states that it should. Just like reality doesn’t behave like the skeptical/cynical model says it should. What is our response? Modify our model of reality. We are forced to reject intention manifestation, the same way we were forced to reject modern ideas of probability and statistics.

When we rejected probability and statistics, we didn’t reject everything. We can’t. A lot of probability and statistics is completely correct and accurate! I would say probably 99% of it :-). But there is a vital flaw. Probability and statistics rely on the existence of the concept of randomness. However, it is my understanding that randomness does not exist. Therefore, while probability and statistics are great tools, we have to realize what they are doing. They are not modeling random numbers. They are modeling choice. Making that simple correction does not undermine all the work that’s gone into the fields of probability and statistics. It simply tweaks it slightly to more accurately fit reality - and it works.

Now that we’re rejecting intention manifestation, we have to realize that a lot of intention manifestation is completely correct. But we need to tweak again. We need to observe reality, and realize where the holes are in our model. Then we need to patch the holes, and use this modified model of reality to accomplish our goals. If reality throws experiences at us that contradict our modified model (which will certainly happen at some point), then we will be forced to tweak again.

So - where does intention manifestation fail?

It fails when we try to manifest something, following the instructions correctly, and it doesn’t work. Our goal isn’t accomplished. We experienced the feelings, we did the visualization, we focused, felt good, believed… and then nothing. No results. Instead of beating ourselves up, let’s beat up intention manifestation :-).

Let’s try to understand how humans created intention manifestation to begin with. We were pretty smart about it… What we did was go around, and interview and talk to all these successful people. We asked them, “How did you do it? What is your story? What made you succeed where everyone else failed?” This is a great idea! Asking questions is a brilliant idea.

Successful people responded with their stories. And a lot of these stories had things in common. So, being the smart human race that we are, we looked at the patterns. We noticed that a lot of successful people had a burning desire to succeed. And this desire consumed their thoughts. We noticed that a lot of successful people believed they would succeed before they did - even when they logically shouldn’t have believed it. We noticed that this burning desire and belief were the very things that made them succeed. Story after story, we noticed that it was this burning desire and belief that got these people through the tough times, and allowed them to create opportunities for them, that led to success. Amazing!

So, after we noticed this, we proclaimed: Successful people had a burning desire and unwavering belief before they were successful. If you want to be successful, you need a burning desire and unwavering belief. Tada!

This idea is outlined in hundreds of books, the most popular of which is undoubtedly Napoleon Hill’s, Think and Grow Rich, published in 1937. A lot of books influenced the creation of the intention manifestation model of reality, but it is my opinion that this book is one of the major ones.

Over time, the intention manifestation model has evolved into what we see presented today, by programs like “The Secret“, and all the other ripoffs. It has evolved from this idea of burning desire and belief, into visualization and feeling your goal is already achieved.

So where is the mistake? Where is the flaw?

I will tell you. It’s very clear to me now that I have hindsight. The flaw is that we think belief, expectation, and feelings cause our goal to be accomplished. This is incorrect.

This is the mistake that we made. We saw that successful people have strong beliefs, and having this sense of “knowing” that they would succeed, before they actually succeeded. This sense of “knowing” is very important - and anyone who has applied intention manifestation knows specifically what it is. This sense of simply knowing that your goal WILL be accomplished. You just know. The mistake that we made is thinking that this sense of knowing caused the goal to be accomplished.

It’s actually a pretty normal mistake that we make all the time. The cynics have solved this problem already for us (hey, what can I say, I owe you a beer :-P). It’s a logical fallacy, called Post Hoc. We noticed that this sense of knowing came before the success, so we assumed this sense of knowing caused the success. Incorrect. Just because it came before does not mean that it caused it.

Our techniques for intention manifestation are based on the idea that we need to induce this sense of knowing. We need to alter our beliefs. We need to create a burning desire. We need to make ourselves believe. We need to convince ourselves that our goal is accomplished. Once we do that, we will have our sense of knowing. And once we have this sense of knowing, then success will follow.

But now we have to reconcile the fact that people can brainwash a sense of knowing in themselves, and the goal still isn’t accomplished. How do you reconcile that? All you intention manifestation people out there reading this… how do you explain how a person can believe 100%, feel it, visualize it, get into it… and then fail? You can’t. Not with the intention manifestation model. It’s time for a new model.

We run into some tension here, because some people might fear that if intention manifestation is incorrect, then we must downgrade to the skeptical/cynical model of reality. Hey, don’t beat yourself up too bad. We don’t have to move in that direction. We can create a new model that incorporates everything we’ve learned. And since our new model is going to be based on personal experience and open mindedness, we’ll be sure to include everything we possibly can, which will in turn help us to accomplish our goals even faster than before.

So now that we know the history of all this bullshit, what is our new model going to be? I propose version 3.0, the choice model :-). Please be aware that I didn’t come up with this all on my own. My current understanding is a result of reading, experimenting, discussing, and stealing ideas from other smart people (one good location for that is Steve’s forum on intention manifestation).

(This is a long post, I’m sorry. I want to get this down on paper before the next lottery drawing, even if that means no one will read the entire post :-P.)

My current understanding is that choice is the root to achieving a goal. This choice is made before the goal is actually manifested, ranging anywhere from a few microseconds, to decades. When this choice is made, we feel a sense of knowing that the goal will be accomplished. Perhaps this sense of knowing comes from a precognitive facility in our minds that actually sees the goal being accomplished - I’m not sure.

What I want to point out is that this choice has a supernatural quality about it that creates the reality we will someday experience. This isn’t simply a normal decision that we experience all the time… this choice is on a different level. English doesn’t have the vocabulary for it.

Ok, look. This isn’t your normal decision. I’m not sure if I can explain it to someone whose never made a decision like this before. To people who have used intention manifestation, you’ve already done it, and you can probably understand what I’m getting at. There comes a point when you say to yourself, “I AM going to do this. Period.” And that sentence alone isn’t what’s so powerful about it. It’s all the emotion… it’s every cell in your body saying “YES” to this. It is a true decision, a real choice. Not the wishy-washy crap that we do daily. It’s the type of choice that makes you slam your fist down on the table, stand up tall, and stare reality in it’s eye. It’s not anger, it’s not fear, it’s not happiness, it’s not joyfulness. It’s the raw emotion of “am”. “To be”. I AM going to do this.

That’s where the power is. It’s not about good or bad, or noble, or evil. It’s raw “YES”. It’s raw “GO”. This is the emotion that is the root to the burning desire. This is the emotion that is the root to belief. To the sense of knowing. This emotion - this choice - is the origin. Maybe you’ve never made a decision like this before, but you’ve probably seen someone make this decision. To look in their eye, and see their resolve. It’s almost like their decision convinces you. You don’t know how they’re going to accomplish their goal, but just by looking at them you know they are going to.

It’s not stubbornness, though it might look a little similar. It’s different. Stubbornness is forceful in nature… this type of decision that I’m describing really isn’t forceful. It’s self-evident. It’s true because it’s true. Stubbornness shuts down your mind… this type of decision opens your mind up. That’s one way to tell the difference.

When you make a decision like this, the world moves. Shit that’s in your way gets out of your way. Shit you need to experience starts to bee-line in your direction.

Now - there are different degrees, which is important to realize. It’s not all about emotion, even though that’s the picture I painted above. Emotion does help though. We can throw all the emotion out the window, and still be left with this choice. However, if you want to make the choice consciously, it would probably be in your best interest to use emotion to help you.

It’s about existence. It’s about being. It’s not inducing a sense of knowing… it’s behind that. Once you hit it, you feel a sense of knowing. Don’t identify it as the sense of knowing - that’s where intention manifestation made it’s mistake. It’s behind the sense of knowing. It’s the root.

Intention manifestation points us in the right direction, which is why it’s successful. But it fails because it’s not precise. It gets us in the right area, but it misses the exact location. We may stumble upon the exact location while using intention manifestation, but only because it’s in such close proximity. These are the times when we succeed. Other times, we are still in the same ballpark, but we fail because we didn’t precisely hit where we need to be.

I’m not sure if I’m explaining it correctly. Sometimes my mind gets carried away… let me try again :-P.

Ultimately, it is a choice. Wash away the extra bullshit, and you’re left with a choice. Now, in reality, we have a real hard time washing away the extra bullshit :-P. So we have to deal with the bullshit instead. That’s where things start getting hard to understand. Everyone has different stuff piled on their consciousness, so we all have different things to deal with when it comes to making this choice. It’s tough to get through and make the choice, because there’s so much crap. That’s why we have techniques, methods, exercises, models, ideas, discussions, growth, etc.

Look, if you believe that you can’t win the lottery, then that is extra bullshit piled on your consciousness that needs to be dealt with before you can win the lottery. But it’s not even that simple. If that’s all you had to deal with, then that would be easy! In reality, we have miles of shit to wade through. A simple belief that you can’t win is just an ounce.

Here, let me draw a picture:

Alrighty!

All hope is not lost… yet :-P.

My point is that we have a lot of stuff that goes on inside of our head that stops us from making these powerful choices all the time. The intention manifestation model does a pretty good job of cutting through a lot of that shit, but it’s not good enough. We can accomplish a lot of wonderful things with intention manifestation, but it falls short when it comes to winning the lottery. We might be able to use intention manifestation to win the lottery, but there is a better way.

I failed to win the lottery this past time because I focused on inducing a sense of knowing, assuming that it was the sense of knowing that created the success. This is false, hence I failed.

Now that I see that this supernatural choice is my goal, I know where to aim. And I’ll know when I get it, because I’ll feel a sense of knowing.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

What does it all mean?!

It means I’m changing my strategy for picking lottery numbers. In the past, I just picked random numbers while filling out the lottery sheet. This method may produce a win, but I want to be smarter about it. My new method is to write down lottery numbers on paper, and examine my “sense of knowing” about them. Then tweak the numbers over and over again, until I find my maximum “sense of knowing”. Then play those numbers.

This “sense of knowing” is something that needs to be polled. It needs to be examined and used. NOT FORCED. Not induced. It’s already in us, so let’s use it! I’m much more confident with this strategy than my strategy in the past, and it feels much more correct.

We shall see where it leads.

If you’ve made it this far, amazing. I really didn’t expect anyone to read this entire post. You must be bored :-). Like I said at the start, I intend on making a much more smaller version of this post in the future. I simply didn’t have the time, and I wanted to get my ideas out before the next lottery drawing. If you’ve skipped to the end, then you’re a lousy cheater! JERK! :-P. Anyways… this post took three days to write. And my thoughts are still bouncing around. They will eventually settle down. Thanks! See ya.

Posted in Lottery, Note to Self, Personal Development, Belief Systems | 33 Comments »

June 17th, 2007 by Sean
OBE, Finally

I had an out of body experience this morning. I haven’t had one in forever. This has been the longest stretch I’ve gone without having one (10 months according to my records), and it felt pretty good to get out briefly.

I didn’t get to explore or anything, unfortunately. I was mostly stuck in my body. I could get out for a little bit, but then I would get yanked back. A pretty standard OBE for me… it’s how most of them go. It’s annoying to read about other people’s OBEs, and see how much fun they have. Mine consist of me floating a few feet from my body, then getting yanked back. Lather, rinse, repeat. Not terribly exciting.

Of course it is cool just to have an OBE in general… even if I can’t get that far away from my body. Nonetheless, I do wish I could do more exploring. Oh well.

Locations!

1. Bed in NY home (both orientations)
2. Keith’s house in NY
3. Scott’s house in NY
4. Jason’s house in NY
5. House in Buford, my room
6. Hotel room for Dianne’s Publix thing
7. Apt 94
8. Dorm room in FL
9. Dianne’s apt in SC
10. Grandma’s FL room (twice)
11. House in Buford, the couch
12. Dorm room in MD
13. Second dorm room in MD
14. Third dorm room in MD
15. Apartment in MD

Most readers probably don’t understand, so I’ll explain everything:

An out of body experience (OBE) is when you perceive your consciousness outside of your physical body. Some people prematurely understand it as floating around like a ghost… that’s an extremely extremely simplified explanation. Things are a LOT more complicated than that. But if this is your first time hearing about OBEs, that might be a good place to start.

I started training OBEs when I was 15 years old. It took me 6 months of training before I accomplished my first OBE, when I was 16. Ever since then, I’ve had OBEs randomly… usually at about once or twice a month. They usually come in spurts, so it wouldn’t surprise me if I have another OBE tonight, since I just had one this morning.

Now, a logical guy would probably say: “Well, maybe it’s a hallucination? Or dream? How do you know it’s REAL?” To answer that question: immediately, I don’t know. And I can’t tell. Most OBEs are very strange… the state of mind is like nothing we normally experience. It’s not a dream state of mind… it’s not a normal waking state of mind… it’s just weird.

But we can be smart about it. For example, most dreams that we have take place in foreign locations. I have dreams about being in malls, in houses, in cities, in school, etc. But OBEs always start in the location where my physical body is at. This is so consistent, that I keep track of all the locations where I’ve had an OBE - which is what the list is above. Those are all the different locations where I’ve had an OBE. One notable location is #6. We were staying in a hotel for one night in South Carolina, and I had an OBE there. I had never visited the hotel, and I’ll likely never visit it again. In my opinion, that is strong evidence that OBEs are more real than dreams. What are the odds I would have a dream of that location the very night that I was sleeping in it, and fool myself into thinking it was an OBE?

What really convinced me that OBEs are real is this experience. In it, I perceived a “black plastic washer” on the ground. Later, when I woke up and checked, it was actually a black guitar pick. This proved to me that I was perceiving reality when I left my body, because I had no clue that my guitar pick was in the location where I correctly perceived it.

Different people have different beliefs on what OBEs are. It isn’t clear cut. A lot of OBEs contain hallucinations, and merge into dreams. It’s not simple. But there are some key features of OBEs which separate them from dreams, and which prove that they are more real than dreams, as outlined above. If you want to read about more proof, then I suggest reading Robert Monroe’s, Journey’s Out of the Body. Monroe’s work could convince some of the toughest skeptics.

When I decided to shut down PsiPog (my old paranormal website), my OBEs stopped. I think it was because I was telling myself that I was done with that part of my self, and it was time to grow and change. Now that I’ve settled down 10 months later, and am starting to hack reality again, I’ve had an OBE. I suspect I’ll start having them consistently again.

I would recommend everyone train for OBEs. While it’s true that my OBEs are usually dull, I have had some really thrilling ones. And just the experience in general is really amazing. To turn around, and see your physical body laying in bed… it’s scary, it’s disturbing :-), but it’s also awesome. I have no doubt that I’m more than my physical body, and that I’m going to survive the death of my body. And it doesn’t have anything to do with faith. I KNOW it. I’ve SEEN it. Having that sense of certainty has made it worth the effort.

Posted in Dream Phenomenon | 9 Comments »

June 15th, 2007 by Sean
“Psychic Wins Lottery”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjNbde_hcbU

EDIT: In other news… I lost this round. I hate losing. I mean… sure, I only lost $1, so it’s no big deal. But it pisses me off.

I got zero numbers correct.

Why does this piss me off? Because I know I can win. I know I can. But I can’t reconcile the fact that I’m losing. I mean, if I look at the numbers, I’m winning overall. I’m still making a profit over the months I’ve been playing, and I’m shattering the mathematical odds. Blah blah blah. No jackpot though. Profit is nice, but it’s not my goal. My goal is the jackpot.

I am going to win. Each loss adds energy to my win.

Bloody hell. I know exactly how I’m going to go about it as well. I know exactly where I’m making my “mistake”, if you want to call it that. The solution is murky, but the “mistake” is clear as day.

If they can do it, I can do it. If I can do it, then I will do it. Simple as that.

Posted in Video, Lottery, ESP | 7 Comments »

June 14th, 2007 by Sean
Lottery Lucid Dream

So I had a lucid dream last night. Before I continue, I’d like to point out that the MegaMillions Jackpot is at $45 million - the amount I require before I start playing. Back to my dream…

Before I fell asleep, I told myself that I wanted to have a lucid dream so I could investigate the lottery. Maybe get some numbers, or some techniques… something. Seemed like a good idea.

I became lucid a few hours into sleeping, during the beginning of a long period of dreaming. I knew I had a lot of time to kill before I would wake up (as long as I didn’t excite myself too much), and decided to get some answers about the lottery. I was inside a huge Victorian house that was also partly a mall, and there were tons of people around me.

I started by grabbing the next available person, and asking them, “How do I win the lottery?” They said they didn’t know. I asked another person. They didn’t know. I went up to another person, and declared that they would be representing my subconscious mind. I asked them how to win… they had a slightly longer response that boiled down to not knowing.

I left the area I was in, pretty frustrated. I saw some children playing, and asked them what they were doing. They said they represented different parts of myself - different characteristics. I asked them how to win the lottery - I asked them for numbers, and for techniques to try. They didn’t know.

By this time I was getting a little frustrated. I began searching for someone who should know, instead of asking random strangers. I would see someone and scoff them away, because I knew they wouldn’t know. Person by person… I floated downstairs, partly surfing on the banister (hey, I was lucid, might as well have some fun :-P). I turned a corner and saw a religious black man, who looked like a shaman.

I made friends with him and asked him how to win the lottery. He told me he didn’t know of the top of his head, but he knew where we could find out. He said he could look it up for me (in a book?), and to follow him. So I did.

We winded around the house, going all over, and eventually found the stairs to the basement. We went down, but it wasn’t a basement - it was the outdoors. It was shifting between night time, and day time, in the matter of a few seconds. He started doing some ritual, and the stars in the sky started to move. He told me he would find out by reading the stars. I told him I thought he was going to use books in a library - he said he could do that too, but that we could also use the stars. I said ok.

I watched him manipulate the stars into weird patterns. They rotated around the sky as he “read” them. I tried to read them too, but I didn’t get it. Unfortunately, I had been lucid for an extremely long time at this point (perhaps 15 minutes), and my lucidity started to fade.

While he was manipulating the stars, a women offered us some food samples. Cakes, brownies, and chocolates, and stuff like that. At first I said no, because I wanted to only eat healthy food, but then I realized it was ok because it was a dream. While eating the food, I became distracted, and lost my lucidity. After that, myself and the shaman forgot about the stars, and got stuck in these narrow tubes in the yard. Lucidity was gone, and I forgot about my lottery goal. No results.

I find that my dream characters are worthless when it comes to usable information. In the past, I have asked them for help on different topics, and they always fail to provide anything substantial. I remember one time, while lucid, I decided to track down a “psychokinetic master” and ask him techniques. When I found him, and asked him, all he gave me was a simple chakra meditation. Another time, I was lucid and asked to speak to my subconscious. A man walked up to me, but it quickly turned into helping someone with a drug addiction (that doesn’t exist). Another time I also asked to speak to my subconscious - the receptionist told me I’d have to call him. After finally getting a hold of my subconscious on the phone after some trickery, nothing was beneficial.

And most of the time in my dreams, all the dream characters do is try to convince me I’m not dreaming. What a waste. I’m lucid - I know I’m dreaming.

I also asked about the lottery when I first started playing. My dream gave me numbers…. 1, 5, 6, 7, 8, 3. Needless to say, they didn’t win.

I wonder how people have precognitive dreams. While my dreams are fun and useful in self-discovery, they always fail at helping figure out things about reality.

Bah.

Posted in Lottery, Subconscious, Dream Phenomenon | 12 Comments »

June 12th, 2007 by Sean
You Reap What You Sow

I’m not Christian, but that doesn’t mean I reject the entire bible. Galatians 6:7 is a keeper.

My mom’s ex-husband (my ex-step-dad) was diagnosed with cancer of the pancreas and liver. The doctors told him he has about 2 months to live without treatment, or 3 months to live with treatment. He chose treatment.

He has two daughters, and they live out of state. They flew into state to visit him, but while in state decided that they would rather hang out with their friends who they haven’t seen in a while. They didn’t have time to see him.

Now that is sad. I don’t know how you cut it up, but that is just plain old sad.

I feel bad for my ex-step-dad. But I can’t deny that he’s reaping what he sowed. I still feel bad though.

I suppose his time has come. He’s lived a dishonest life. And now he leaves this world prematurely with broken relationships. It’s such a simple lesson, but it’s so powerful.

I try to do what’s right. I try to be honest, I try not to steal, or cheat. I’m not perfect, but I make a conscious effort to do what’s right in difficult situations. A lot of times it’s hard to tell if doing what’s right is actually a good decision. If everyone around you is doing what’s wrong, and you can’t see any immediate downside… then it’s tough. But man - let me tell you - doing what’s right is right for a reason. You reap what you sow. I see it clearly now.

I’ve only seen people reap extremely negative things a half-dozen times in my life. Reality is very forgiving. But if you keep making bad decisions, relying on Reality’s forgiveness for your existence… you will be in a world of hurt when Reality says enough is enough. My ex-step-dad lied to everyone he knew his entire life. He cheated on his multiple wives. He managed to borrow time from Reality for quite a while… but now Reality is cashing in.

It is sad. But what’s sad is that the only way for him to learn was to bring it to this extreme. If Reality has forgivin you, I highly recommend taking the easy lesson, before Reality decides to bitch-slap the lesson into your skull.

Posted in Philosophy | 5 Comments »

June 7th, 2007 by Sean
Daily Psychic Stuff

How do I use my own psychic skills in my daily life? Hmm…

The first thing to realize is that everyone is psychic. We use our psychic abilities all the time.

The second thing to realize is that when we use our psychic abilities, we don’t go out of our way to do it. It’s part of our thinking process, and happens in harmony with our other normal functions - like memory, emotion, associations, etc.

We have to sort of step outside of societies limiting ideas, and look at reality. Reality doesn’t distinguish between a psychic skill, and some other mental skill. It’s all where you want to be, doing what you want to do. Reality doesn’t monitor your mind, saying, “Oh, now Sean is using a psychic skill… cool”. It’s just me being me. And you being you. It’s natural.

Even saying that some function is a “psychic ability” is a little incorrect. I mean - what if I ask you, “When did you use your memory today?” How do you answer that question? Well, first you have to use your memory to think back on today… so there’s one :-P. Then you might think of conversations you had with people, and think back to a point in that conversation when you used your memory… which is pretty much every 3 seconds :-P. It’s just as hard to answer, “When did you use your psychic abilities today?” Every 3 seconds I use them, in whatever way my mind needs at the moment.

For example, when writing the beginning of this post, I instinctively asked my subconscious how to phrase certain parts, and asked for clarification on ideas. Before I started writing, I asked my subconscious if I should write a post today, and also checked the date of my last post. Then I remembered reading a comment asking about how I use my subconscious on a daily basis. I debated whether writing this post, then decided to start, partly because I felt confident that my subconscious would help me if I ran into trouble explaining something.

Maybe I’m at work, and reading a book. There is a psychic function for reading a book, it almost feels like… it’s more than just reading over letters on a page - it’s a transfer of ideas and beliefs. It’s a two-way conversation with the author. If I want, I can see the author in front of me, explaining his or her ideas to me. I can see them animated and excited during - what they feel - are the important parts. I can ask questions, and get answers. I can ask for clarification, or examples.

I can see the thoughts that led up to the authors point of view. I can see how they think. I can see the environment the author lives in. I can see the difficulties they’ve experienced. I can see the realizations they’ve attained, and the obstacles they’ve overcome. Is this “psychic”? Reality is one big blur - how do you draw a line in liquid?

Now - we can practice psychic abilities, and make them stronger and more accurate. The same way we can exercise our memory, or muscles, or learn a song on guitar, or play chess. Whatever you focus on gets stronger. But you do need to realize that the distinction between one skill or another is just in your head. Whatever your goals are, there is a cost in an amount of focus you need to spend to acquire them. If you want to be a rock star, then you better spend a lot of your focus on playing guitar. If you want to receive psychic information, then you better spend a lot of your focus on meditation and receptiveness. If you want to acquire truth, then you better spend a lot of your focus on self-realization, and inward digging.

When people ask me how I use psychic abilities on a daily basis, these are where my thoughts go.

Posted in ESP, Subconscious | 14 Comments »

June 4th, 2007 by Sean
It Begins!

I lied in my previous post. I’m not done talking about the lottery:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcdeda9-nzI

Posted in Video, Lottery, Subconscious | 13 Comments »

June 3rd, 2007 by Sean
The Lottery, One Last Time

This is the last post I’ll make about the lottery for a few weeks, I promise :-P.

My old intention was to simply win the lottery. I told myself constantly that, “I am happy and grateful now that I’ve won the lottery.” I visualized. I got my emotions going. I obsessed my mind with it. All that stuff. And I won.

And it’s made me realize that I really don’t want to just “win the lottery”. Sure, I’ve won a bunch of scratch off tickets, but that’s the end of the road. What I really want now is to win the jackpot.

I’ve changed my intention to, “I am happy and grateful now that I’ve won the entire MegaMillions Jackpot.” This simple change has made me uninterested in playing scratch off tickets. Which is the correct emotional response, according to my intention.

I have a rule that I won’t play MegaMillions unless the jackpot is $45 million or more. I made this rule a few months back. The reason being: if I win the jackpot, it’s going to really suck if I win the $12 million one, when on average the MegaMillions will pay out between $50 and $100 million. So the rule was created not to play unless it’s $45 million or more. Maybe you think I’m just being greedy now :-P. But hey - I think it’s a smart choice. Brand me any adjective you wish.

When someone wins the jackpot, it goes back down to $12 million, and slowly climbs it’s way up. It takes about 2-2.5 weeks to reach the $45 million mark again. So during this time period, I don’t play.

Now the kicker: someone won $44 million. I was pissed :-P. I had waited patiently for 2.5 weeks to play again, waiting for it to get $45 mil or higher. Someone wins right below the cut off point for me. Back to ground zero. Now I have to wait another 2.5 weeks.

Which is the reason why I won’t be posting about the lottery for a little while. I’m not doing the scratch off anymore, and I’m not playing MegaMillions until it gets to $45 mil or higher. Perhaps this will force me to talk about some new topics, and give the whole lottery thing a rest for at least a little while :-P.

Posted in Lottery, Random Stuff | 14 Comments »

May 31st, 2007 by Sean
Mental Awareness

Josh e-mailed me the following question:

> What techniques or thought trails did you follow to help put up that “translator” between yourself and your mind… because to hear you think it there are 3 entities we possess our minds, our bodies, and our subconscious. You found a way to put up a translator between the three. That is my largest desire with my mental development, as I’ve been attempting to accomplish for a couple years now, to no avail. Sure I interpret it, and get messages I can manipulate to make sense, but to hear you say it, you have conversation with yourself Kind of jealous in that respect.

> Thanks in advance for any insight and thoughts you can share.

I got interested in speaking to my subconscious after I read chapter 10 from Robert Peterson’s book, Out of Body Experiences: How to Have Them and What to Expect. Read the chapter if you haven’t. It recounts how Peterson came into contact with his “inner voice”, which is the same thing I use (I just call it my “subconscious”).

I started the same way Peterson did… just asking myself random questions, and listening for the answer. At first it doesn’t feel like anything special is going on. I can remember feeling frustrated with the supposed “answers” I was receiving. They weren’t clear, they were too short, too quick, and it felt like 90% of the time I wasn’t even getting a response. When I felt I had actually gotten a response, a lot of times it was incorrect. Very frustrating.

I kept at it. Asking myself questions, and listening. After about a month, things started to improve slightly. Slowly, over time, it began to personify. This took a while… perhaps 6 or 8 months.

The key, in my opinion, is to tell which thoughts are yours, and which thoughts are from your subconscious. This isn’t something that can be taught - it’s something you have to monitor the inside of your own head, and get a feel for it. Thoughts, ideas, pictures, emotions, associations, etc, are bouncing around in your head constantly. Before I communicated with my subconscious, I really wasn’t aware of how much shit goes through my head at any given moment. Now, I can see most thoughts and emotions pretty clearly. When something new arises, I am aware of it, and see it clearly for what it is.

That sort of mental identification is pretty tricky at first. If you are to look inside the mind of any normal person, there is so much shit going through it. Even “stupid” people have extremely fast minds, jumping from one topic to another, with a flood of memories, emotions, ideas, etc. We can take control of this process, and become aware of it.

One fun exercise is to just sit and think. Sit and think for 20 minutes, about whatever you want to think about. Switch topics whenever you want. Just float around and think, with no rules on what you can’t think about.

After the 20 minutes, go back and try to remember every topic you thought about. Every thought that went through your mind. Every memory that triggered a new line of thinking. For example, if I try this, I might remember thinking about a girl I’m interested in. But I’ll also remember thinking about how my cats spill water in the kitchen all the time. How did I jump from a girl to my cats spilling water? How did my mind make that jump? At first you might not be able to answer that question. But with practice, I can see that I was thinking about the girl, then I was thinking about my past girlfriend, then I thought about the time my past girlfriend cooked me a meal, then I thought about seeing my roommate cook a meal with his girlfriend, then I thought about the kitchen, then I thought about my cats spilling water on the kitchen floor. This sort of jumping around happens in an instant, and it can be very hard to get a hold of because it’s so quick.

Track it down. Notice when you recall a memory. Notice when you jump from one topic to another. You don’t have to stop yourself - just NOTICE it. Be aware of it.

When you ask yourself a question, your mind will start all these acrobatics. It will start pulling up a memory, playing a video, digesting an emotion, flickering an idea… all at once. I know I tell people to get their mind to shut up, but you can also try the opposite. Let your mind wander. But identify everything that’s happening in your mind, when it happens. Slow it down, and watch yourself.

Practice that. Over time, you’ll get a real sense for how your mind works.

Ask yourself a question, and listen for the answer. Watch your normal mind routine, and discard it. Look for information that doesn’t originate from your mind. An idea, or an emotion, or a feeling of truth will pop-up out of nowhere. Investigate it. Pull it in, and open it up. What do you feel? What do you see?

I know I stress that translation is important, but if you are aware of the thoughts in your own mind like I described earlier (being aware of when you access a memory, and how you jump from topic to topic, etc), then translation will come naturally. Once you hit that point, you’re already aware of what’s going on.

In this post, I tried to present the subconscious from a different angle. Hopefully this alternate perspective will help :-). Good luck, and feel free to post any follow-up questions in the comments.

Posted in Subconscious | 16 Comments »

May 27th, 2007 by Sean
I Won… Again

Bahahaha.

Absolutely ridiculous :-).

So I walked to the store, needing to buy some batteries. I brought $2 with me specifically because I wanted to play a scratch off lottery again, and win $100. My subconscious told me I was going to lose, but I didn’t care. I went. Bought the batteries. Bought the ticket. And lost.

On my walk home, I was pissed. I was talking to my subconscious, and declared (being rude, almost): if you know that I’m going to lose, then you know when I’m going to win. Go FIND me a winning ticket, and I’ll drive to it!

So I grabbed my camera and documented my adventure. I ended up filming about 60 minutes of footage, and trimmed it down to 10 minutes for YouTube. Enjoy!

(I’d also like to note that I haven’t bought any lottery tickets since my last winning, so this isn’t a case of playing a whole lot to win a few times - I’m making a profit).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3O6HjGOx7kg

Posted in Video, Lottery, ESP, Subconscious | 25 Comments »

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