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reality bizarres the standard

October 16th, 2007 by Sean Story

A lot of times it feels like I’m living in a story. Like reality is just a play - a scripted sequence of events - and we all just play along.

When I talk to someone, I’m simply reading my lines. And they return with their lines. The dialog has already been created, and we simply walk through it. Just acting it out.

Even the supposed “zany” or “random” people follow a predefined script. They say the funny things they’re suppose to say, and everyone else laughs like we’re suppose to laugh.

Sometimes I do wonder whether life is deterministic or not… but I think just the fact that I’m contemplating such a thing proves that it’s not. I don’t know about anyone else for sure, but I do know that I am aware. I am aware of this moment. I can cut right through it.

One thing that makes me curious is to think about my memory. What am I working with? What is in my head? What is my earliest memory? I mean… how did I get here? When did I first become aware?

It seems like I should be able to scan back in my memory, and remember the moment when the I - the me - first arrived. But instead it’s just a gradual blur. Was it always like this? Am I just in a state of perpetual amnesia?

*shrugs* Thoughts…

This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 16th, 2007 at 6:56 pm and is filed under Philosophy, Random Stuff. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

### 7 Responses to “Story”

1. cinderwild Says:
   October 16th, 2007 at 6:59 pm

   My biggest question about that comes from genetics and the scientific sequence of events we are prescribed to. It seems like everything about us, even the things that we thought were our choices, are predetermined by some sperm and egg making contact.

2. Gumby Says:
   October 16th, 2007 at 7:45 pm

   I remember my first memory. It was all black. I think I was in my mom. I seriously remember that. I’ve always remembered it.

3. delimew Says:
   October 16th, 2007 at 10:52 pm

   i think the main reason people almost never remember their first years is because the brain is still developing, and as a result they aren’t fully aware of what’s going on around them. after all, it seems that they almost only ever act on instincts.

   as for the whole predetermined thing, i agree it can seem very likely at times. personally, i’m very precognitive. and constantly experiencing things exactly as i foresaw them does make you think you have no choice in the matter.
   though, personally, i’ve reached the conclusion that we do have free will, and seeing the future only proves that time doesn’t work the way people think it does.

4. ClearVision Says:
   October 17th, 2007 at 7:40 am

   Hmm… It makes sense. I guess it’s just the feeling of helplessness that comes when realizing what one is really capable of. It’s not really a question of manipulative vs. perceptive anymore, because essentially you’re acting on information gathered - i.e. you’re manipulating either way. ‘Dreameneering’ reality? Sounds too fantastic to be true - but then again, many things we believe to be true are too fantastic for the general population to understand, or even to believe.
   Life… is a story, I agree. If you know what’s going on behind the scenes, people seem like puppets on a string. I’ve had this experience. Loads of times.

5. cinderwild Says:
   October 17th, 2007 at 3:21 pm

   Does anyone else recall memories that don’t exactly make sense in a timeline? I recall being in utter darkness and saying to myself, ” Well, that was fun. What now? Doo doo doo doo.” ( I’m not meaning to be silly, but that was it in a paraphrase) I’ve always referred to these as ‘memories before I was born’.

6. NeoPsychic Says:
   October 17th, 2007 at 6:27 pm

   My day was all great and upbeat until I read your blog. It’s a little depressing to tell you the truth.

7. ClearVision Says:
   October 21st, 2007 at 10:52 am

   Memories… are purely subjective. They can even be falsely induced. Really… What’s the point of memorizing anything if you’ve never experienced it, and your mind is just making that part of your life up?

   As an extreme example, after the Dresden bombing in WWII, there were people claiming they remember fighter planes flying low, through the burning city, shooting at civilians. However, this would have been physically impossible - the flames would have consumed the planes at these low heights. Yet, the civilians still believed this had happened - until physicists proved them wrong.
   Also, there once was a criminal investigation a few years back about a rape, and the victim falsely identified someone he had seen moments before the crime as the rapist.
   The point: memories are flawed, and don’t work like a hard disk recording everything. It’s psychology 101.
   Just for the record: My earliest memories are of me walking towards a light, almost like a tunnel. I hear the beat of a heart - and other strange organic noises.

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